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OSHO Online Library   »   The Books   »   Om Mani Padme Hum: The Sound of Silence, the Diamond in the Lotus

Chapter 3: This Place Is for Innocence

This is your real birth.

This real birth I have called sannyas.

One birth is from the mother and the father; another birth is that which happens between the disciple and the master. And the second birth opens all the doors and all the secrets to explore. Life becomes a continuous adventure, a moment to moment excitement, a day and night ecstasy. Neither life disappears into death nor day dies into the darkness of the night. Suddenly you become aware that day and night are two wings of the same bird, that life and death are two wings of the same bird.

The whole sky of consciousness is yours.

You don’t have to be a Christian, you don’t have to be a Hindu, you don’t have to be a Mohammedan. You only have to be a child.

Just a few jokes, for you to laugh..

Gordon MacTavish becomes the head of the Clan MacTavish and inherits a fortune. His friends at the pub fear that his new wealth will change him. There is a big discussion at the pub when the door bursts open and in strides MacTavish, waving them all to the bar.

“When MacTavish drinks,” he booms, “everyone drinks!”

When everyone has had a drink, he slaps down a dollar bill on the bar and announces, “And when MacTavish pays, everyone pays!”

Hamish MacTavish is flying from Los Angeles to New York to go to his company’s annual sales meeting. He is sipping his complimentary champagne in the first class lounge when a gorgeous blond sits down next to him. He is trying hard not to look at her ample chest, and when she says, “I know you must be wondering about my T-shirt,” Hamish is very pleased to be able to look straight at her bulging breasts with the initials N.N.A. printed across them. He admits that he is curious, so she tells him it stands for the National Nymphomaniacs Association. And as it turns out, she is also going to her annual national convention.

Excitedly Hamish asks, “What kind of man do you prefer?”

“Well,” she confesses, “my absolute favorite is mature American Indians.” But then noticing Hamish’s disappointment, she quickly adds, “But a close second, Jewish businessmen.”

“In that case,” says Hamish, unable to contain himself any longer, “let me introduce myself.” He then raises his champagne glass and says, “My name is Geronimo Goldberg.”