Chapter 4: Everything Is Interdependent
Why do women go on continuously nagging men, continuously finding ways and means to torture them? It is unconscious. It is centuries of repression that have poisoned their being, and of course, they cannot attack directly. That is not possible for many reasons. One: they are more fragile than men. They may learn karate, aikido, judo, but that will not make much difference. They are fragile; that is their beauty. If they learn too much karate and judo and jujitsu and aikido and become very muscular and strong, they will lose something - they will not gain. They will lose their femininity, they will lose their flower-like fragility, delicacy. That is not worth the effort.
Woman is fragile. She’s meant to be that way. She has a deeper harmony than man. She’s more musical, more rhythmic than man, more rounded. One thing: because of her fragility she could not be as aggressive as man. Another thing: man has been training her in a certain way; man has been giving her a certain mind which does not allow her to move out of her bondage. She has accepted it. It has been so long that it has reached her very bones. She has accepted it. But freedom is such a thing that whatsoever happens, you remain freedom-oriented. You can never lose the desire to be free, because that is the desire to be religious, that is the desire to be divine. Freedom remains the goal, whatsoever happens.
So, what to do when there is no way to revolt and the whole society is that of man? How to fight it? How to protect a little dignity? So woman has become cunning and diplomatic. She starts doing things which are not directly an attack, but indirect. She fights with man in subtle ways. That has made her almost a crocodile. She waits continuously for her opportunity to take revenge. She may not be aware of anything in particular that she is fighting against, but she is just a woman, and she represents all womanhood. Centuries and centuries of indignities and humiliation are there. Your man may not have done anything wrong to you, but he is the representative of all men. You cannot forget it. You love the man, this man, but you cannot love the organization that men have created. You can love this man, but you cannot forgive man as such. And whenever you look into this man, you find the male mind there, and you start.
This is very unconscious. This creates a certain neurosis in women. More women are neurotic than men. It is natural, because they live in a man-made society, tailored for men, and they have to fit into it. It is tailored by men for men, and they have to live in it, they have to fit into it. They have to cut many of their parts, their limbs - alive limbs - to fit into the mechanical role that is given to them by man. They resist, they fight, and a certain neurosis arises out of this continuous fight. This is what bitching is.
I have heard: A sweet old lady went to a pet shop. In the shop window was a very beautiful dog, and she said to the shop owner, “That nice, sweet dog you have in the shop window.’
And the shop owners aids said, “Yes lady, a very beautiful bitch. Isn’t she beautiful?”
The woman was enraged. She said, “What! Watch your tongue! Don’t use such words. This is a respectable part of the town. Be a little more cultured!”
Even the shop owner was a little puzzled, embarrassed. He said, “Sorry, but have you never heard the word used before?”