Chapter 3: Sex, Love and Prayerfulness: Three Steps to the Divine
The moment you come to the ungarbed one, the unclothed one, you become one with it, because when you know the naked, it is no one but you. In fact, everyone is searching for himself through others. One has to find one’s own home by knocking on others’ doors.
The moment reality is disrobed you are one with it, because the difference is only of garbs. Clothes are the barrier, so you cannot disrobe reality unless you disrobe yourself. That is why meditation is a double weapon: it disrobes reality and it disrobes you as well. The reality becomes naked, and you become naked. And in a moment of total nakedness, total emptiness, you become one.
I am not against sex. That doesn’t mean I am for sex. It means that I am for going deep in it and uncovering the beyond. The beyond is always there, but ordinary sex is hit-and-run sex, so no one goes deep. If you can go deep, you will feel grateful to the divine that through sex a door is opened. But if sex is just hit-and-run, you will never know that you were close to something greater.
We are so cunning that we have created a false love, that does not come after sex but before it. It is a cultivated, artificial thing. That’s why we feel that love is lost when sex is fulfilled. Love was just the preface, and now the preface is no longer needed. But real love is always beyond sex; it is hiding behind sex. Go deep in it, meditate in it religiously, and you will flower into a loving state of mind.
I am not against sex and I am not for love. You still have to transcend it. Meditate on it; transcend it. By meditation I mean you have to pass through it fully alert, aware. You must not pass through it blindly, unconsciously. Great bliss is there, but you can pass by blindly and miss it. This blindness has to be transformed; you must become open-eyed. With open eyes, sex can take you on the path of oneness.
The drop can become the ocean. That is the longing within every drop’s heart. In every act, in every desire, you will find the same longing. Uncover it, follow it. It is a great adventure! As we live our lives today, we are unconscious. But this much can be done; it is arduous, but it is not impossible. It has been possible for a Jesus, for a Buddha, for a Mahavira, and it is possible for everyone else.
When you go into sex with this intensity, with this alertness, with this sensitivity, you will transcend it. There will not be any sublimation at all. When you transcend, there will be no sex, not even sublimated sex. There will be love, prayerfulness, and oneness.
These are the three stages of love: physical love, psychic love and spiritual love. And when these three are transcended, there is the divine. When Jesus said, “God is love,” this was the closest definition possible, because the last thing we know on the path toward godliness is love. Beyond that is the unknown, and the unknown cannot be defined. We can only indicate the divine through our last realization: love. Beyond that point of love, there is no experience because there is no experiencer. The drop has become the ocean.