Chapter 22: Work Can Produce, Silence Can Create
Moving into aloneness, into such silence, peace and bliss, I suddenly realized that at the same time I was coming closer and closer to you. Dancing with your love, never before have I been in such a space - coming home at last. But I have to go soon, and I am so afraid to lose it. I feel so fragile, so vulnerable. How can I take care of this treasure, help it to grow and share it at the same time over there?
The joy, the love, the blissfulness, the feeling of coming home - if this is true, you need not worry about losing it. The truth can only be found; it cannot be lost. That which can be lost was only your imagination. In any case, going away will be of tremendous help in understanding yourself.
Either you will find that whatever you were feeling here you are feeling wherever you are, or you will find that back in your own world, all that blissfulness and all that love disappears. Then it was just a figment of your imagination. Even to understand that is good, so next time when you come here you can avoid falling into the trap of imagination. As far as I can see, you have come to a space which you cannot lose even if you want to. And the only way to grow deeper into it is to share it with people.
Life needs continuous growth. The moment you stop its growth, it starts dying. So go into the world full of songs, full of dance and abundant love, and give it unconditionally, without any judgment, to anybody who is receptive - and you will go on growing in the experience both deeper and higher.
Something has happened - that much I can say to you. Now it depends on you to let it grow or not to let it grow. And the way of growth is very simple: share it. But the sharing should not be with any judgment on your part; the sharing is not to be done with those who deserve it. Love knows no discrimination between the deserving ones and the nondeserving ones. Love enjoys giving itself - it does not matter to whom. And the miracle of love is that whomsoever you give it to, becomes deserving.
I have a question about guilt. I can’t see it, or taste it, or touch it, but somehow it is always there - especially when I am doing nothing. It only disappears when I am working, and returns immediately at the thought of dancing, or singing, or meditating. What is the mechanism of guilt and will I ever be free of it?
The mechanism of guilt is very simple. You have been conditioned from your very childhood to believe that doing something is better than doing nothing - and meditation is going into nothingness. The idea has been imposed on you for so long it has taken roots in your mind. But because the idea is basically false, it can be dropped.