Chapter 12: You Cannot Crucify Truth
They had always been suspicious of this man, this Archimedes, and now their suspicion was proved right: “Too much thinking is bad.” They had always been of this opinion, and this man was thinking too much.
Now he had gone mad and was crying, “Eureka!” on the street: “I have found it!”
What happened? How ecstatic he was in that moment! And it was not the ultimate truth, it was just an ordinary problem. It is ordinary now: once discovered, scientific truths become ordinary, common. But he discovered it. In that moment of discovery, all tension relaxed, and he was so happy, so ecstatic, that he forgot himself. Whenever you are happy, the first basic thing is to remember that you were searching for something else, not for happiness. If you search for happiness directly, you will miss it forever and forever. It is a byproduct: you are engaged in search of something else, and then that something else is discovered. The discovery makes you so fulfilled, the whole effort relaxes, the whole tension goes; you are at ease, at peace, at rest, and you feel filled with happiness. Happiness is a byproduct.
The second thing to remember: if you seek it, how can you lose yourself? The seeker can never lose himself; the ego remains, you remain a point of reference. Whenever happiness happens, you are not there. Remember moments of happiness: you were not there. It may have happened in a deep love, it may have happened in a discovery, or it may have happened just when you were playing cards, but you became so lost.suddenly the upsurge! Anything can trigger it, but a direct search is dangerous because you will miss it.
If you come to a master in search of happiness, you are near him for the wrong reasons. Then you remain hidden in your wrong reason. You remain close physically, spiritually there is much distance. Your eyes are blind, you will not be able to know this man, Jesus or Buddha. It is impossible, because your eyes are filled with wrong goals.
Or you may not even be in search of happiness, there are even lower goals. You may be near a master to attain power, you may be near him to attain some siddhi, you may be near him to attain a more egoistic state; then you will miss him completely. There are even lower aims. And the lower the aim, the more possibility there is of missing because then you are more blind. You may be near him just for very ordinary reasons, like seeking health: you are ill and Jesus will cure you. Or you are poor and Jesus will give you money; his blessings will become money to you. Or you don’t have a child and he can give you a child.
The lower the aim, the more you will miss, because the lower the aim, the more you are in the deep valley. And Jesus exists on the top of the hill: the distance goes on becoming more and more. Many have escaped, but of those who have come near, not all of them have come near either; only one who comes for the right reason. And that right reason is truth. But why do you never seek it?