Chapter 2: With Nothing to Lose
Mulla said, “It must be my dad. It seems he is again running after the maid, and he seems to be drunk.”
The old man must be one hundred and twenty-five. Mulla had said, “I have attained to this age because of celibacy and because I never touched any wine, I have remained away from women,” but here is his father still rushing, drunk, trying to catch hold of a woman.
Death has already happened the moment you became incarnated in the body. The moment you entered the womb, death has already happened. Your clock, the clock of your life, can run only so far - seventy years, eighty years - it depends on a thousand and one things. But your clock can only run so far. It makes no difference how you live your life, death is going to happen. Death cannot be avoided.
The questioner has asked: “As sex is closely related to death what is the meaning of spontaneous celibacy?”
The first thing is birth and death are both related to sex, but just by becoming celibate you are not going to transcend death. Death has already happened in birth, there is no way to transcend it. It is going to happen because in fact it has already happened. It is only a question of time unfolding. You are rushing toward it each moment.
So don’t try to be celibate just to avoid death because that too again is fear. The people who try to become celibate are afraid of death, and one who is afraid of death can never know what death is, can never know what deathlessness is. So don’t be afraid.
And celibacy can only be spontaneous. You ask: “What is the meaning of spontaneous celibacy?” Celibacy can only be spontaneous, there is no other type of celibacy. If it is not spontaneous, it is not celibacy. You can force it, you can control your sexuality, but that is not going to help. You will not be celibate, you will be only more and more sexual. Sex will spread all over your being. It will become part of your unconscious. It will move your dreams, it will become your motivation in dreams, it will become your fantasy. In fact, you will become more sexual than you were ever before. You will think more about it and you will have to repress it again and again. And whatsoever is repressed has to be repressed again because the victory is never complete. There is no way to destroy sex by force, by violence. There is no way to control and discipline it. The people who have tried to control and discipline it have made the whole world very pornographic. Your so-called saints have a very pornographic mind. If a window can be created and a hole can be made in their heads, you will be able to see just sex, pornography. It is bound to be so. It is natural.