Chapter 14: Suffering: Broken Harmony
So the West doesn’t only need psychoanalysis. That only gives a superficial adjustment. The West needs meditation. It needs methods of meditation that can give authentic psychic harmony. Then you become aware of a suffering, of dukkha, meaninglessness. But one has to be aware of this innermost suffering. This awareness is a great bliss in disguise, because once you become aware that life is meaningless - that death is awaiting you, that everything just ends and leads nowhere; that the whole of life, the whole effort, just leads to the grave, that you just end - then this suffering, this dukkha and the awareness of it, is the point from where you can take a jump into another realm, into another dimension.
It is not that you will find meaning in life - it is not so. It is not that there will be no death now - it is not so. But once the boundary of the mind is crossed, you become aware of this inner suffering, this meaninglessness. This feeling of meaninglessness is still bound with your past.
You could never conceive of existence as meaningless, you have always been purposeful. That’s why this suffering comes to you. But once you take the jump. And you cannot go back; there is no way to go back. Once you have come to the end limit of the mind, you have come to a point of no return. You cannot go back, and before you there is meaninglessness and death. If you can stay in it, if you can be courageous enough to be in it, if you can be a witness to it, then there is an explosion. Then the suffering is lost.
Then there is no suffering, then there is no longing for meaning, then there is no desire for immortality. Then the seriousness has gone, then you become playful. Then everything changes into a new dimension - the dimension of play, the dimension of leela. Only then is the harmony between you and the cosmic, between you and existence, regained within you. Then there is no barrier because then there is no mind.
The mind is a search for meaning; the mind is a search for immortality. Or you can say that the ego is in fear of death and if there is no meaning, then the ego has no foothold to stand upon. This gap is the spiritual abyss. From the mind, from the boundary of the mind, you will become aware of a spiritual agony, a meaninglessness, and death as the only goal. If you jump into it, into the abyss, then there is mutation, then there is no suffering, then you become blissful. And then there will never be any suffering at all, because the whole point of suffering is lost - the ego is lost, the mind is lost.
Now you can look at this in another way. The body becomes unhealthy if the body is in tension, disharmonious within itself or with the atmosphere. The mind becomes anguished if it is in conflict with itself or with other minds. Your being feels meaninglessness; because of your body and your mind you become alienated with the cosmic spirit. Because of your body and your mind - these two boundaries - you become alien, a stranger, uprooted from the cosmic existence. You feel suffering. If these two barriers are not there, you have become one. Then there is no question of meaning for you. You are not, the cosmic is. You don’t need any goal. Now you cannot die because you are not, the cosmic is. Now you are just a wave in the ocean. Even if the wave disappears, it remains in the ocean, the ocean remains. Now you have come to realize yourself as the ocean so there is no fear of death. Death is not. As far as your cosmic being is concerned, death is not.