Chapter 11: Ego Is Just a Habit
Spontaneity simply means now there is nothing to hinder your self-nature from expressing itself. All the rocks have been removed, all the doors have been opened. Now your self-nature can sing its song, it can dance its dance.
I use both the words: sometimes I say, “Work upon yourself,” and sometimes I say, “Be spontaneous.” And the logical mind is bound to find a contradiction, but there is no contradiction at all - because working on oneself means neti neti, neither this nor that.
Spontaneity has not to be created; if it is created it is not spontaneity. Then there is a contradiction: if it is cultivated then it is not spontaneous, obviously. A cultivated spontaneity cannot be true; it will be false, phony, pseudo, it will be only a mask. You may be simply acting, you will not be really spontaneous. And it cannot go very deep; it will remain only something painted from the outside. Just scratch the so-called cultivated, spontaneous person, and all his spontaneity will be gone. He was only acting, he was not really spontaneous.
Real spontaneity comes from the center; it is uncultivated, that’s why we call it spontaneity. There is no way to cultivate it, no way to create it, no need either. But if you want to become an actor, if you want to act, then it is a totally different matter - but remember: any real situation will immediately provoke your mind. It will come rushing towards the surface; all spontaneity will disappear.
It was carnival time, and the gay guy dressed himself up as a lioness. A hunter carrying a rifle approached him. “Bang! Bang!” He pretended to shoot him. The lioness fell down dead. The crowd was amused.
As the hunter was about to leave, the gay guy pulled off his lion’s head and said softly, “It’s the law of the jungle, sweetie: if you kill, you eat!”
Anything cultivated will be only on the surface, it will be only a drama; it will not be your authenticity.
So I will say the first thing to remember is: spontaneity has to be discovered - or, it will be better to say, rediscovered, because when you were a child you were spontaneous. You have lost it because so much has been cultivated - so many disciplines, so many moralities, virtues, characters. You have learnt to play so many roles, that’s why you have forgotten the language of being just yourself.
The second thing you ask:
Shouldn’t we be loving as much as we can?