Chapter 6: Life, Love, Laughter
The moment you accept, Asang, that “I don’t know,” all confusion will disappear, evaporate, simply evaporate - just as dewdrops evaporate in the early morning sun leaving no trace behind them. The confusion is because you are clinging to a few things which in the past you thought were very valuable. You thought that they were ornaments, golden, studded with diamonds, and now I have made you aware that they are nothing but chains - maybe golden chains and maybe studded with diamonds, but what are diamonds? - they are also stones. And what is gold? The difference exists only in man’s mind, otherwise gold and iron are the same. The evaluation is ours, the projection is ours. But chains are chains and the chains have to be broken. Now the things you have believed were ornaments, decorations, are being shown to you persistently as nothing but chains.
Either you will have to escape from me.but remember, escaping won’t help you. Once you have been on my surgical table it is better to go through the whole operation! If you escape in the middle of the operation you will remain confused your whole life, because whatsoever you have understood from me is not going to leave you, it will haunt you. So there is no escape from me.
Once you are with me you have to learn the ways of transformation, you have to go through a radical change. You have to die to the past and be born anew. It is hard, it is painful. Every birth is painful, and spiritual birth particularly is very painful. There are no sedatives available. For spiritual birth one has to go through many pains, but those pains are worth it because you grow out of your imprisonments; you grow into freedom, you grow up.
And once you have tasted the joy of growing up, of becoming mature, then there is no problem. Then you know that all that you have left behind was worthless, was rubbish.
But, Asang, this moment has to be passed through. This critical moment has to come in every disciple’s life when the disciple is in a kind of limbo, neither here nor there, half in the past and half moving with me, many times thinking to escape.
Just the other day Somendra asked a question: “But, Osho, where is the exit?” There is no exit here! It is one-way traffic. You only come in.we don’t have another door, only the entrance. Then you have to be reborn; that is the only exit. But the exit is not in escape, it is in “inscape.” It is going inwards.
Asang, I am taking as much care as you can tolerate at this moment! I will take more.. The medicine is bitter and it has to be given in small doses. And this is not homeopathic treatment, remember, this is pure allopathy - it is pure poison! It is crucifixion, because only then is there resurrection. But that too takes three days. Between the crucifixion and the resurrection.three days. Remember those three days; they are significant, very significant. Those three days are the most difficult days.
Just think of Jesus: three days in the cave, neither dead nor alive. He couldn’t have been completely dead because once you are completely dead you are gone. He was not completely alive either; otherwise he would not have remained for three days in the cave, he would have escaped sooner. He must have been hanging between these two polarities of birth and death.