Chapter 2: Accept Yourself As You Are
But by and by, the child learns how to doubt. We teach, in fact - the society, the family, the school, the university, they all teach how to doubt. Because unless you doubt, you cannot be very clever and cunning; unless you doubt, you cannot be left in this great world of competition: you will be destroyed. So doubt has to be learned; and once you learn it, by and by, trust is forgotten. It remains deep within you, but you cannot reach to it - too many obstacles. You cannot cultivate it; it cannot be taught. The only thing is, you have to reverse the process - you have learned doubt, now unlearn it.
Trust was there, trust is there, trust will be there. All that has to be done is to be done with doubt; nothing is to be done with trust. Why do you doubt? Why are you so afraid? - because doubt means fear. Whenever you love somebody, you don’t doubt, because fear disappears. Whenever there is love, fear is not. But when you don’t love, you doubt; when you don’t know a person, you doubt more - a stranger, then you doubt even more; unfamiliar, unknown, then you doubt more. Whenever there is fear, there is doubt. Deep down, doubt is fear. If you go still deeper, doubt is death, because you are afraid of death. And it seems that everybody is trying to kill you; fighting - everybody competitive - everybody trying to push you aside, dethrone you. Doubt is death.
The whole mechanism has to be understood. Then what to do? Why is one afraid of death? You have never known death. You may have seen somebody else dying, but you have never seen death. When somebody is dying, do you really know that he is dying - or simply disappearing into some other world? Doubt is without base; fear is without base - it is just an assumption of the mind. When somebody dies, do you think he is dying, or simply disappearing into another world, moving to another plane of life, or to another body? You will have to know it in deep meditation. When thinking stops, suddenly you see that you are separate from the body.
So I don’t say trust first; I say meditate first. That is the difference between meditation and prayer. People who teach prayer, they say, “Trust first, otherwise how can you pray?” Trust is needed as a basic condition, otherwise how can you pray? If you don’t trust God, how can you pray? I teach meditation, because meditation doesn’t require trust as a basic necessity. Meditation is a science, not a superstition. Meditation says you experiment with your mind - it is too full of thoughts; thoughts can be dispersed, the clouds can be dispersed, and you can attain to an empty sky of your inner being. And it needs no trust - just a little courage, a little effort, a little daring, a little persistence and perseverance, a little patience, yes, but no trust. You don’t believe in God? That is not a hindrance to meditation. You don’t believe in soul? That is not a hindrance in meditation. You don’t believe at all? That is not an obstacle. You can meditate, because meditation simply says how to go withinwards: whether there is a soul or not doesn’t matter; whether there is a God or not doesn’t matter.