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Chapter 3: No Peaks, No Valleys

After checking into the large motel complex, the evangelist read in his room for several hours, then sauntered over to the bar where he struck up a conversation with the pretty hat check girl. After she had finished working they shared a few drinks and then retired to his room. But when the evangelist began removing her blouse she seemed to have second thoughts. “Are you sure this is alright?” she asked. “I mean, you are a holy man.”

“My dear,” he replied, “it is written in the Bible.”

She took him at his word, and the two spent a very pleasant night together. The next morning, however, as the girl was preparing to leave, she said, “You know, I don’t remember the part of the Bible you mentioned last night. Could you show it to me?”

In response, the evangelist took the Gideon Bible from the nightstand, opened the cover and pointed to the flyleaf on which someone had inscribed, “The hat check girl screws.”

These are your priests, your evangelists, your great spiritual leaders! They are neurotic and they are driving the whole of humanity neurotic. Avoid all spiritual nonsense - and spiritual nonsense is real nonsense; all other nonsense is very ordinary, very mundane. In fact, with mundane matters you cannot be too nonsensical - reality will prevent you, science will prevent you, your own sense of pragmatism will prevent you. But with religious nonsense there are no checks. There is no reality, no criterion, you cannot judge, so you can fly off into all kinds of esoteric bullshit.

And your priests are such bullshitters, and for centuries they have been bullshitting on you! You are crawling in holy cowdung! It is time to get out of it.

The way you are is the only way you can be. Accept it - not only accept it but rejoice in it, love it, and the peak will start opening up within your very heart, and suddenly you will find you are awake in the Garden of Eden, immediately. It is not a question of going anywhere, just of being here.

You ask me: “How may I come to you?”

There is no need. You have to come to you, not to me. I am not here to create a new kind of neurosis. There are enough alternatives available! - Christianity, Hinduism, Mohammedanism, Jainism, Buddhism.three hundred religions in the world. You can choose your own kind of neurosis; they come in all shapes, in all sizes. You can easily pick any kind of fanaticism, neurosis, and that will keep you engaged your whole life - but simply engaged. It will not give you time or space to dance, to sing, to celebrate.

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