Chapter 2: The Mystery beyond Mind
I see you as your total darkness, the whole forest of you. And once I see a single individual in his totality, all individuals are involved because that forest is not separate. In that darkness boundaries meet, mingle and become one.
You are here. If I become too attentive toward one individual, then I am focusing myself. But still, even focusing, I continuously feel your boundaries are mingling with the other. So for certain purposes I may take you as an individual, but in reality it is not so. Once I am not focused I simply look at you without seeing you - just a look, then you are no longer there. Your boundaries are meeting with everyone else’s and not only with man and human beings - with trees, with rocks, with sky - everything. Boundaries are fictions, hence individuals are fictitious.
I am here because I cannot be anywhere else. This is how life has happened. You are here because you cannot be anywhere else. This is how life has happened to you. But it is difficult to accept it. Why is it difficult to accept? - Because then you cannot manipulate it, then life becomes greater than you.
If I say you are here because you are a great seeker of truth, then you are at ease. If you are here because you are a great seeker then the ego is fulfilled. Then if you choose, you can go. Then you are the chooser. Then you are controlling life, not controlled by life. But I don’t say that, I say you are here because life has happened this way. You could not have chosen, it is not your choice. Even if you leave that will not be your choice. Again, that will be how life happens to you. If you choose to remain, that too is not a choice. Choice is not possible. Choice is possible only with the ego.
So whenever ego is not fed, uneasiness, discomfort, is felt. There are two ways to be at ease: one is to go on feeding the ego, another is simply to drop it. And remember, the first way is temporary. The more you feed it the more it demands, and there is no end to it.
So I tell you: life has happened in such a way that I am here and you are here. And it has been happening many times before, and it will continue happening the same way. If you can realize this, much more will immediately become possible. If you realize this you will be more open, less closed, more vulnerable, more receptive. Then you are not afraid. Then life can pass through you. Then life becomes just a breeze, and you become an empty room, and life comes and goes - and you allow it. Allowing is the secret - the secret of all secrets.
Hence I emphasize, insist, that you are not here because of any choice on your part. I am not here because of any choice on my part. As far as I am concerned there cannot be any choice, because I am not. As far as you are concerned, you may be under the delusion that you are here because of your choice, but that is not a fact.