Chapter 9: Here Now
People are afraid of reaching the second stage because it is just like a breeze: it comes and goes. When it comes it fills you totally. It gives you so much contentment that you cannot think there is anything more, and you cannot think that it can ever change. That’s why lovers go on promising each other - but their promises are not going to be fulfilled. Then they will feel guilty. Of course when they had given the promise it was not a lie, they were really, authentically feeling it. But it was the feeling of that moment.
After a time your psychology develops, your maturity develops; you start loving new things, new people. Your vision of beauty changes - your attitude in all its dimensions goes on changing. It is almost impossible for the other person to change exactly with you. Neither is it possible for you to change exactly with the other person. And that’s where the whole of society is living in tremendous suffering. We have forced people to live together because they had promised something. They don’t deny it, but what can they do? In that moment the promise was true, and then everything changed. Now they don’t feel anything for the other person - and it is not only that they don’t feel anything, they feel they are strangers.
You can look at husbands and wives and inquire, “Do you know your wife? How long has is it that you have not looked into her eyes? How long has is it that you have not given a moment to look at her or to listen to her?” Perhaps years have passed.
It is one of the strangest things that husbands cannot remember the face of the wife with whom they have lived for thirty years. Just ask them, “Close your eyes and try to remember your wife, her face,” and everything goes vague. For thirty years they have not looked at her. They have really tried not to look at her; they were afraid to look at her. There was a day when they wanted to look at her for the whole twenty-four hours.
Psychological love is a changing phenomenon, and unless humanity accepts its changeability gracefully we will never allow human beings to rise to the second level - because those who rise to the second level suffer more. Poets suffer more, farmers don’t suffer that way, woodcutters don’t suffer that way, fishermen don’t suffer that way. Painters suffer, musicians suffer, because they go on changing. They continuously need something new. Now, the other person cannot make that available. And the other person has his own individuality, her own individuality. They start growing farther and farther and farther away from each other. And society goes on forcing them to live together because, “Marriages are made in heaven.”
Do you do any art work?
My whole work is art! I don’t do anything else except art work.
Do you dream? And what kind of dreams do you have?