Chapter 4: Trust Cannot Be Betrayed
The bereaved moved across to the sobbing man, patted him on the back and said, “Cheer up, old boy, cheer up. I shall probably marry again.”
Beware. This is a disease, to fall in love with a married woman or a married man. Look for reasons. It is not love, there is something else working behind your mind, in your unconscious.
Another thing: the married woman is not easily available. That too creates desire. Easy availability kills desire. The more unapproachable, the more inaccessible the woman is, the more the desire; you can dream about her. And in fact there is not much possibility that it will ever become an actuality. There is every opportunity to be romantic about a married woman; you can play with your fantasy. It is not easy to make her available to you. You are not interested in unmarried women because they will not leave much chance for romance; if you are interested, they are ready, there is no space left. There is not that long, long waiting.
Many people are interested not in love but in waiting; they say that waiting is far more beautiful than love. In a way it is so, because while you are waiting you are simply projecting, you are dreaming. Of course your dream is your dream and you can make it as beautiful as you want. The real woman is going to shatter all your dreams. People are afraid of the real woman. And a married woman becomes more unreal than real. The same is the case with a married man; he is far away. There is not much possibility that he will really enter into a love relationship with you.
I have heard..
A young man went to a very wise old man, and the young man said, “I am lovesick, sir. Can you help me?”
The wise man thought and he said, “There is only one cure for love, and that is marriage. And if marriage cannot cure it, nothing can cure it! If you get married you will be cured; never again will you think about love!”
Yes, marriage cures it so certainly, so absolutely, that if marriage cannot cure your love, then nothing can cure it. Then you are incurable. It is good to fall in love with a married woman because then there is no possibility of cure; you remain lovesick.