Chapter 24: The Mirror Reflecting Nothing
But everything is moving, so when there is no object your awareness starts moving in a circle and comes back upon itself. Rather than being involved in an object, it falls back to the source, as if an old man has moved again back to his childhood.
Meditation simply means awareness being aware of itself, the mirror reflecting nothing but just being itself. It is one of the most difficult subjects to talk about. It is better not to talk about it. Even if you can manage to say something it will be misunderstood. In life there are things which cannot be talked about, and meditation is one of those great experiences which can be expressed, but through different means, not words - through your eyes..
The eyes of a meditator have a different quality, a different depth, a certain compassion. The face of the meditator has something of the quality of a marble statue. The gestures of the meditator are so peaceful and so cool that if you can watch them, even watching them will bring coolness and silence and calmness to you.
The meditator walks differently; he has a grace in every one of his actions. He also speaks differently. He does not bother about linguistics or grammar, his whole concern is to expose his heart, as far as is possible, through his speaking or through his non-speaking. His presence has a tremendous vitality, a freshness, a youthfulness. Even at the last moment of his life.his body may have become old, but he is young.
So rather than thinking about how to talk about it, be it, and let people feel it. The experience that you are going through is immensely beautiful, but by talking about it you may create a disturbance in your own experience. If you are not understood, or misunderstood, you will start suspecting that perhaps you are hallucinating or perhaps you are daydreaming, because nobody seems to understand what you say.
It is better not to say until you are in a situation where even if the whole world misunderstands you, it cannot create a doubt in your being. Your experience has become so crystallized that there is no possibility of raising a question. Then you can talk - whether people understand or not, that is their problem. But right now, in the beginning of your experience, things are very fragile, very delicate, just like the petals of a roseflower. You have to be aware of the fragility of your experience.
It is not always right to talk about things. Sometimes the right thing is to be silent, and perhaps your silence will say much more than you can say. And one thing is good about silence: it cannot be misunderstood.
The husband had arrived home unexpectedly, and was staring suspiciously at a cigar smoldering in the ashtray. “Where did that cigar come from?” he thundered at his wife, so loud that she hid under the bed covers. There was a heavy silence, then from the closet a shaky voice answered, “Cuba.”