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OSHO Online Library   »   The Books   »   The Dhammapada: The Way of the Buddha, Vol. 11
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Chapter 10: Laugh Your Way to God

I have been telling so many jokes about the Italians, but not a single angry letter. They understand that jokes are jokes! If you understand too much you cannot joke. A little bit of misunderstanding is needed.

Now, one of the most British of all the British sannyasins, Prembodhi, has written, “You don’t understand the British at all.” You simply prove my point!

Somebody else has written, “This is not right. You say that no British woman is a woman; they are all ladies.” I was simply paying respect!

And I think it is a well-known fact that nothing should be said against the dead. For the dead you should always show respect. That’s what I was doing! Why are you angry about it?

I repeat again: it is very difficult, almost impossible, to find a British woman - only ladies are there. All men may not be gentlemen; men after all are men, boys are boys! And old boys more so! But as far as women are concerned, they carry the culture, the religion, they are the foundation stones. The British woman has a certain face. No other woman has that kind of nose.they all need plastic surgery!

The only problem with the Jews is when it comes to the question of price. Then they will go on haggling for centuries. Enlightenment will be just in front of them, but they will haggle for the price.

So that is the problem, Amitabh; there you have to be aware.

A Scot went into a tailor’s and asked to see a suit.

The Jewish proprietor came back with a nice Harris tweed. “Look at this,” he said, “and it’s not fifty pounds, not even forty. Thirty pounds and it’s yours.”

The Scot examined it carefully. “I wouldn’t give you twenty-five pounds for it, not even twenty. My price is eighteen pounds.”

“Right,” said the Jew. “That’s the way I like to do business - no haggling.”

Then there were the two Jews who bumped into each other after forty years, and rushed to the nearest pub to celebrate.

“It will be magic to have a drink together after all these years,” said one.

“Yeah,” said the other, “but don’t forget, it’s your round.”

The rich widow needed a blood transfusion, so a Jew donor saved her life. She was so grateful, she gave him a hundred pounds, but after a relapse she needed another one and this time gave the donor fifty pounds.

The third time he saved her life she had so much Jewish blood in her that she just thanked him very much.

The second question:

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