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Chapter 11: Beliefs Are Lies

“What happened?” he asked.

“Your saw cut my finger off.”

“Well,” asked the foreman, “what did you do wrong?”

“I don’t know!” said the Polack. “I just touched it like this.ow, damn! There goes another one!”

A gorilla in the zoo died. His female companion, after a few months, began getting violent as her need for sex increased. The zookeepers decided to get a man to make love to her. They picked up a Polack down on skid row and offered him twenty dollars for the job.

They muzzled the she-ape, tied her arms to the bars, and let the Polack gingerly into her cage. When the gorilla saw the guy had an erection, she suddenly ripped her arms loose from the bars and began crushing him in her embrace. “Help!” he shouted. “For God’s sake, help!”

“Don’t worry,” the keeper shouted back, “we’ll get an elephant gun and shoot her.”

“No! No! Don’t shoot her. Just get her muzzle off - I wanna kiss her!”

Enough for today.