Chapter 2: Personal and Existential
I find it very difficult to be open to you. I hear you talking in the lectures, and you say that you are available to all of us. But I find it difficult to be open enough to be available to you.
Just close your eyes, and feel as though you are a closed flower. Just feel like a bud, completely closed, closed as far as you can go inside.. Good! Now start opening like a flower, as if it is morning and the sun is rising. Open slowly, relax the body, open.open..
There is no problem. You have not tried, that’s all.
Whenever you want to open, try the opposite first. Remember, this is one of the basic things. If you want to relax, first make yourself as tense as possible. Then automatically you cannot remain tense. Once you have gone to the extreme, then you have to relax. So start cooperating and relax, mm?
This is the posture that will happen when one is closed. This is the womb posture - the head falls down, and you are again in the womb. In the womb you are completely closed, and when you are born you start opening.
So every night you can try this: just before you go to sleep, for five minutes close yourself completely. You will become just like a small child in the womb, with absolute darkness all around - nowhere to go, no door available, no possibility to relate to anyone, all connections cut. Remain in that state for a few seconds, and when it becomes unbearable, think of the flower opening in the morning. Then remain in that opening and go to sleep. Report to me after one week. And there is nothing to worry about!
I feel I’m getting somewhere. I’ve done the Encounter group and the Tathata and now I’m meditating. I’m relating to people openly and with trust.
Very good. Always remember that at no cost should mistrust be allowed. Even if your trust becomes a possibility that people can deceive you, that is good. Even if you are deceived because of your trust, it is better than not to trust.
It is very easy when everybody is loving and beautiful and nobody is deceiving you - then to trust is easy. But even if the whole world is deceptive and everybody is bent on deceiving you - and they can only deceive you when you trust - then too, go on trusting. Never lose trust in trust, whatever the cost, and you will never be a loser, because trust in itself is the ultimate end. It should not be a means to anything else, because it has its own intrinsic value.