Chapter 23: Emptiness and Stuffing
A woman who was concerned that she was stuffing herself returns to meet with Osho, after having over-eaten consciously for seven days as he had suggested.
Well I’m not interested in food anymore!
Good. That’s how the mind works: if you want not to eat, then the desire arises to eat too much. If you suppress something, then you create a problem. If you say no to the mind, then the mind resists and rebels. So whenever you see that there is some problem, the best way is to go with it, not to fight it.
If you feel you are eating too much, then eat as much as you can, go beyond the limit. If sex is the problem, then move into it as much as you can, simply get exhausted.
Fighting creates attraction and anything that becomes a sin becomes immediately very pleasurable. Many things that are thought to be very pleasant are not pleasant, but because society has condemned them, they have gathered a glamour around them. This is where the whole of humanity has been missing for so long.
All the religions of the world have tried to fight against sex, and they have created a very sexual, pervertedly sexual world. Except for Tantra they all missed; only Tantra found the key. It allowed sex, and it not only allowed it, it insisted on sex. It not only insisted, it makes sex the very door, the very path.
Suddenly, moving with the desire and going beyond it, a repulsion arises and you start seeing the foolishness of it. It is not the mind that says it is foolish; that won’t help. It is the existential realization. From your very being you realize that it is foolish, and then there is no need to make any effort, it simply drops. The very realization becomes the transformation.
Seven days ago you were saying that it is difficult, impossible, and you were obsessed with food. I told you to eat as much as you can, and just within seven days you say you don’t want to eat, that there is no liking, the desire has disappeared. So remember this for any other problem: go to the rock-bottom of it - and there is a change.
One thing I have realized is that the reason for stuffing myself was not sex, but an overwhelming loneliness that comes over me every now and then on a physical, material level. I have plenty of friends and love and affection, but I don’t know what to do with it, to feel it more.
Feel it more, and not only feel it, delight in it. These are just wrong notions. People think that when they are lonely they have to be sad. This is just a wrong association, a wrong interpretation - because all that is beautiful has happened always in loneliness; nothing has happened in a crowd. Nothing of the beyond has happened except when one is in absolute solitude, lonely.