Chapter 4: The Good Wife
Go to the Himalayas: the higher the peak is, the deeper the valley will be. The deepest valley exists near Everest - it can only exist there. Only such a high peak can allow such a deep valley. And there is a balance: the valley has to be deep to the same extent as the peak has gone high. They balance each other. Watch a tall tree reaching to the sky: the roots are hidden, but the roots go deep down to the same extent.if the tree has grown one hundred feet, the roots have to grow one hundred feet deep down. Otherwise, what will support the tree? What will support this one-hundred-foot tree? And if the tree chooses just the height and tries to deny the roots it will die. And this is what you have been doing. This is what the whole of humanity has been doing. That’s why the whole of humanity has shrunk, caved in. Everything has gone wrong, because you want only high moments.
People come to me and they say, “Yesterday I was ecstatic and now I am low.” You have to be. What will support the ecstasy? What will support the peak? The peak could not exist alone; this valley was bound to follow.
Watch the waves in the ocean: the higher the wave goes, the deeper is the wake that follows it. One moment you are the wave, another moment you are the hollow wake that follows. Enjoy both, don’t get addicted to one. Don’t say, “I would always like to be on the peak.” It is not possible. Simply see the fact: it is not possible. It has never happened and it will never happen. It is simply impossible - not in the nature of things. Then what to do? Enjoy the peak while it lasts and then enjoy the valley when it comes. What is wrong with the valley? What is wrong with being low? It is a relaxation.
A peak is an excitement, and nobody can exist continuously in an excitement. You will go completely mad. That’s why when you love a person you have to hate the same person. But don’t be afraid of hate, just accept it. If you love deeply you will hate deeply. If you don’t love much you will not hate. The moment husbands and wives stop fighting, love disappears. If you see a couple absolutely okay it is a dead couple; the love has disappeared long before. They are no longer fighting - then they are no longer in love. Now there are no more peaks, no more valleys
Lovers fight. Only lovers can fight; they depend on fighting. And they know that nothing is wrong, because when they fight they create a situation to move deeper into love. It is a rhythm. If you have been a lover, which is a rare thing, you know that just before making love, if you have been fighting and angry and trying to kill each other and then you make love, then the orgasm has a high peak such as can never be attained ordinarily. Because when energies move farther away - hate means energy is moving farther away - there comes a point when you have moved as far from each other as you were before you fell in love. Just the same point has come again. You are two individuals, completely independent, all communication has dropped. You are again strangers, not knowing who the other is. This was the situation when you fell in love. If you don’t escape you will fall in love again - the whole romance, a new honeymoon. And if you cannot get the honeymoon again and again, love will become stale. It will be just a dead thing, you will have to carry it like a burden.