Chapter 66: A Buddha Is a Nobody
I have heard an anecdote. In a Sunday school the priest was giving a religious lesson to the very small boys of the neighborhood. He talked much about what good people would achieve - the crowns of glory and a heavenly reward. Those who are good would be crowned in heaven. Then at the end of his talk he said, “Who will get the biggest crown?” There was silence for a while, then a little boy, the hatmaker’s son, stood up confidently and said, “The one who has the biggest head.”
This is what we are all doing. Our definition of the biggest head may differ but we have a conception of something special in the end, and because of that “special” we go on moving. But remember, because of that “special” you are not moving anywhere at all, you are moving in desires. And a movement in desire is not a progress, it is circular.
If you can still meditate - knowing well that nothing special is going to happen, that you will just come to a reconciliation with the ordinary reality, that you will be in harmony with this ordinary reality - if with this mind you can meditate, then enlightenment is possible this very moment. But with this mind you won’t feel like meditating - you will say, “Leave everything if nothing special is going to happen.”
People come to me and they say, “I have been meditating for three months and nothing has happened yet.” A desire.and that desire is the barrier. It can happen in a single moment if desire is not there.
So don’t desire the mysterious. Really, don’t desire anything. Just be at ease, at home with reality as it is. Be ordinary - to be ordinary is wonderful. Because then there is no tension, no anguish. To be ordinary is very mysterious because it is so simple. To me, meditation is a play, a game; it is not a work. But to you it goes on being work; you think in terms of work.
It will be good to understand the distinction between work and play. Work is end-oriented, not enough in itself. It must lead somewhere, to some happiness, to some goal, to some end. It is a bridge, a means. In itself it is meaningless. The meaning is hidden in the goal.
Play is totally different. There is no goal to it, or, it itself is the goal. Happiness is not beyond it, outside it; to be in it is to be happy. It will not give you any happiness outside of it, there is no meaning beyond it - all that is there is intrinsic, internal. You play, not because of any reason, but because you enjoy it right now. It is purposeless.
That’s why only children can play really; the more you grow, the less capable you become of playing. Because of more and more purpose, more and more you ask why, why should I play? More and more you become end-oriented: something must be achieved through it, in itself it has no meaning. Intrinsic value loses meaning for you. Only children can play because they don’t think of the future. They can be here timelessly.