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OSHO Online Library   »   The Books   »   The Dhammapada: The Way of the Buddha, Vol. 11
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Chapter 8: Laughter: Love, Joy, Gratitude

Nothing is wrong with you, nothing is wrong with garlic either, but garlic is going to create a few problems for you. And the problem that you have come across is not really a great problem; soon you will have to face greater problems. The British lady at the most may leave you; that is not a problem - that will be getting out of the problem!

Find some woman - be free of ladies! A woman is beautiful, a lady is a problem. And it is very difficult to find a British woman - I have not come across one yet. They are all ladies. The men may not all be lords, but the women are all ladies.

An Englishman and his wife were strolling around their West Indian estate when they came across a black girl and boy making love in the bushes.

“My gracious!” exclaimed the British lady to her husband. “They do it just like human beings!”

If she thinks you are primitive that is nothing - at least she thinks you are a human being! Or maybe she does not think that you are a human being, but she cannot say it. It is so unmannerly to say to you that you are not a human being so she says you are primitive. That is not a great danger - at the most the lady will leave you. You continue eating garlic. If there is going to be a choice between a British lady and garlic, prefer garlic; it is far healthier. But the real problem will come later on - once the British lady has left you, then you will be in trouble.

Did you hear about the Gypsy girl who had to give up wearing garlic around her neck?

It kept the vampires away alright, but it attracted too many Italians.

So if you want to drop garlic, drop it when the British lady has left you; meanwhile she will protect you from the Italians. Every man needs a woman as a protection; otherwise he is so helpless. Once the other women see that one woman is protecting you they don’t bother you. The moment they see you are unprotected they all jump upon you!

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