Chapter 23: Consciousness is Total, Pure Energy
That’s why in the East, particularly in India. It is a very ancient country, and ancient countries become cunning just as old people become cunning. Out of cunningness this country decided for child marriage, because once somebody is adolescent hope starts arising - longing, romance, poetry; now it will be difficult. The best way that India found was child marriage, marriage of children. They don’t know what marriage is, they don’t know what relationship is, they don’t know what love is - they are not even hungry for it - sex has not yet become a mature thing in them. Let them get married.
Just think - a three-year-old girl being married to a five-year-old boy. Now they will grow together, just as brothers and sisters grow together. Have you ever felt any desire to divorce your sister? I don’t think anybody ever divorces one’s own sister, there is no need. You take it for granted. Everybody thinks his mother is good, beautiful; his sister is beautiful, his brother is beautiful. You take these things for granted.
There was only one relationship which was available for you to choose out of your own freedom: your spouse, your woman, your man. In India we destroyed even that freedom. Husbands and wives were as much given as brothers and sisters. And when you have grown together for years a certain kind of friendship, a certain kind of association, arises. You become accustomed to each other.
But this is not relationship, this is not love. But India had decided for stability - and an ancient country knows perfectly well love can never be stable. Choose love and you choose trouble.
In the West love has become more and more important, and with it all kinds of troubles have arisen. The family is falling apart, disappearing really. People are changing their wives and husbands so many times that everything seems to be just in a chaos.
I have heard about one Hollywood actress, when she married for the thirty-first time. After three days she became aware that this man had once before also been her husband. Now even to remember for so many times. People change, their faces change. Now, this cannot happen in India. Even after lives your wife will remember you; even after lives you cannot escape, there is no escape.
But I am all for love, and I am against marriage, particularly the arranged kind, because the arranged marriage gives you satisfaction. And love? - love can never satisfy you. It gives you more and more thirst for a better and better love, it makes you long for it more and more, it gives you tremendous discontentment. And that discontent is the beginning of the search for truth. When love fails many times, you start looking for a new kind of lover, a new kind of love, a new quality of love. That love affair is prayerfulness, meditation, sannyas.
It is good that no longing for ordinary love affairs is ever going to be satisfied. The longing will be intensified more; no relationship is going to fulfill you. They will make you more frustrated, and no tears will relieve it, they cannot. They may help for the moment, but again you will be full of pain and agony. Nothing is changed by many and beautiful dreams and adventures, nothing is changed. Yet I say go through them. Nothing is changed, but you are changed by going through all those dreams and beautiful adventures. Nothing is changed in the world.