Chapter 6: The Three Psychologies
I am reminded of Luther. Pecca Fortiler, a disciple, asked Luther, “What to do? I cannot stop sinning.” Luther said, “Sin stronger.” Absolutely right. I have never felt very much sympathy with Luther’s thoughts, but about this I am absolutely with him: stronger, sin stronger. If you cannot stop then why bother? Sin stronger because only at the extreme is transformation possible. Lukewarm people are never transformed.
Never be lukewarm. That is the only stupidity you can go on committing. Because when you are boiling one hundred percent, only then does the evaporation happen. Lukewarm, you can remain lukewarm for many, many lives and nothing will happen. Move to the extreme. If you are in sex, move into it totally. Don’t create any conflict, don’t withhold anything. And meanwhile go on working. Let sex be there on its own. You go on working for awareness. Meditate more and more and, by and by, you will see that the same energy is changing, transforming.
When you change, the energy changes because energy belongs to you. When your standpoint changes, the energy has to change its level. When your plane of being changes, then energy has to follow you. It is your energy.
When you move towards the center, by and by, you will suddenly realize that sex is disappearing and love is gaining strength. You are becoming more and more loving. Now the love is not a lust. Love is not like fire, it is a very cool light. Sex is fiery, it is fire. It is like hot sun. Love is like cool moon; it gives you light, but very cool, calm. A silence pervades love. Then, by and by, sex will become more distant, more distant, more distant, and the same energy will be moving in love. You will not feel starved. Rather, on the contrary, you will feel more fulfilled, because love fulfills more. It is the higher form of sex, and every time you go higher, you feel more fulfilled because higher forms are more subtle energies. They are not gross, they are more subtle. They fulfill, they give you more. Then go on rising into awareness. A day comes when suddenly you are rooted in the center, centered. Now love also takes a new dimension; it becomes compassion.
What is the difference? In sex you are concerned with yourself, not concerned with the other at all. You simply use the other. That’s why sexual partners continuously fight, because an inner feeling is there, “The other is using me.” Sexual partners cannot come to a point of harmony. They will have to fight again and again, because the woman thinks the man is using her - and she is right! Nothing is wrong in it. And the man thinks the woman is using him. And whenever somebody uses you as a means, you feel hurt; it seems like an exploitation. The man is concerned with his own sex, the woman is concerned with her own sex - neither is moving towards the other. The movement is not there. They are two selfish people, self centered, exploiting each other. If they have to talk about love and sing and be poetic, that is just allurement, persuasion, seduction - but they are not concerned with the other. Once the man has used the woman, he turns over and goes to sleep, finished - a thing to be used and thrown away.