Chapter 6: No-Mind Innocence
The so-called simple saint is not simple because he is fighting: fighting with his instincts, fighting with his body. He is continuously at war, never at peace. How can he be simple? He is more complex than the ordinary people are. His complexity is, of course, very subtle and invisible. He cannot even sleep peacefully.
Mahatma Gandhi was very much afraid of sleep for the simple reason that while he was awake that he was able to repress his sexual desire. He believed in celibacy. He believed that celibacy is a basic requirement for a simple life, innocent life. While awake he was able to repress, to control, to be the master of the instinct, but in sleep all control disappears. The mind goes to sleep. The controlling, the fighting mind is no more in power and the repressed starts surfacing. Hence sexual dreams. He was suffering from sexual dreams even when he was seventy, and he was afraid of sleep.
And saints have always been afraid of sleep. What kind of saints are these people? Sleep should be one of the most innocent things in life, and they are afraid of it. The fear is coming because of a certain requirement that they have imposed upon themselves which they cannot fulfill in sleep. In sleep sex will surface. You may start dreaming things that you don’t want, but now you cannot have control over things.
It is because of this fact that psychoanalysis is more interested in your dreams than in your waking life. It is strange, it is ironical, but it is very indicative: indicative of the man and his repressions.
You can’t trust a man while he is in the so-called awake state. You cannot trust him. He is bound to falsify things, he is bound to be phony. And it may not be that he is deliberately phony. He may have become so accustomed with his phoniness that that’s all that he knows about himself. He may have repressed his natural instincts so deeply, buried them so deep underground, that he himself has become absolutely unaware of their presence. You cannot trust what he says about himself when he is awake. You can only trust his dreams.
Hence psychoanalysis has to go into your dreams, because your dreams show your reality more clearly than what you say when you are awake. What kind of awakening is this? Your dreams are far more natural, far more authentic, than your waking life.
Mahatma Gandhi suffered to the very end from sexual dreams. He was very much afraid of sleep, as all the saints have always been. They always go on cutting their hours of sleep. And people think if the saint sleeps only two hours he is such a great saint. He only sleeps for two hours! And the reason why he sleeps for two hours is fear: fear of his own unconscious. It is not a simple life, it is very complex.