Chapter 2: Your Mind Is the Judas
He said, “This is my condition..”
They said, “My God, this may never be fulfilled!”
Mahavira said, “That simply means existence does not need me. I have no complaint; perhaps my work is completed and I am unnecessarily being a burden.” But the condition was fulfilled.
Such trust in existence, such unwavering trust, comes when you start taking responsibilities. As you feel more responsible towards small things around you, existence goes on responding in a thousand-fold way. You are not a loser.
Can a chain-smoker become meditative? I have smoked for twenty-five years, and I feel that in smoking I stop going deeply into meditation. Still, I can’t stop smoking. Can you tell me something about it?
A meditator cannot smoke, for the simple reason that he never feels nervous, in anxiety, in tension.
Smoking helps - on a momentary basis - to forget about your anxieties, your tensions, your nervousness. Other things can do the same - chewing gum can do the same, but smoking does it the best.
In your deep unconscious, smoking is related with sucking milk from your mother’s breast. And as civilization has grown, no woman wants the child to be brought up by breast-feeding - naturally; he will destroy the breast. The breast will lose its roundness, its beauty.
The child has different needs. The child does not need a round breast, because with a round breast the child will die. If the breast is really round, while he is sucking the milk he cannot breathe; his nose will be stopped by the breast. He will get suffocated.
The child’s needs are different from a painter’s need, from a poet’s need, from that of a man of aesthetic sensibility. The child needs a long breast so his nose is free and he can do both - he can breathe and also feed himself. So every child will try to make the breast according to his needs. And no woman wants the breast to be destroyed. It is part of her beauty, her body, her shape.
So as civilization has grown, children are taken away from the breast of the mother sooner and sooner, and the longing to drink from the breast goes on in their minds. And whenever people are in some nervous state, in tension, in anxiety, the cigarette helps. It helps them to become a child again, relaxed in their mother’s lap.