Chapter 17: No Goal
A very beautiful argument. Test the argument that he is making: If you consciously await enlightenment, it means, in other words, you are accepting that right now you are not enlightened, you are deluded; otherwise there is no need to await enlightenment.
His argument has tremendous penetration. He is saying that if you await enlightenment, every moment of your awaiting you are insisting that you are deluded. When you continuously insist, “I am deluded, I am deluded, I am deluded” - although you are not saying it, that is what it actually comes down to - you are conditioning yourself, hypnotizing yourself, to be an unenlightened being. Then how can enlightenment happen to you? You are creating a thick wall, and every moment of awaiting is making the wall thicker and thicker.
Do you see the beauty of his argument? Naturally, in waiting for enlightenment you are accepting the fact that you are not yet enlightened. And as you go on and on waiting, and your unconscious goes on being conditioned that it is not yet awakened, not yet awakened, not yet awakened... This idea can become such a great barrier that it will prevent your enlightenment.
If you wait for enlightenment, clinging to delusion, though you pass through countless eons you will still not be able to gain enlightenment. As you bring up the saying, just arouse your spirit, and see what principle it is.
What principle is functioning? Waiting for enlightenment, you are unknowingly, unconsciously, using a certain principle of autohypnosis.
Just here in Pune, some twenty years ago, a young man who was a professor in the university came to see me. He wanted a private interview; he did not want to say anything about his problem before others. And later on, naturally I understood that it must have been embarrassing for him to say it before others. He had from his very childhood learned the habit - which is very strange, because a man’s physiology does not allow it - of walking like a woman.
A man cannot walk like a woman for the simple reason that he does not have a womb. It is the womb in the woman’s body that makes her walk differently; without the womb, nobody can manage it. But something must have happened in his childhood of which he was not aware. Perhaps he was born in a house where there were only girls - his sisters - and he was the only boy. And naturally, children learn from imitation: if he was surrounded only by girls, he may have started moving the way they were moving and become almost fixated on it.
Everybody was laughing at him, and particularly that he is a professor in the university, and walking like a woman, and all the students laughing.. He had been to doctors, but they said, “What can we do? - there is no disease, no medicine can help. There is nothing wrong in your body. No operation can help.”