Chapter 8: Fictitious Father, Crackpot Son
The husband looked at the breasts lying on the floor, and he said, “It is okay.” He took his teeth out and threw them.
The wife said, “You think you are going to win?” She took off her hair, she was baldheaded, and threw the hair on top of everything. It was becoming a big heap!
Actually something like this happens. By and by you start dropping your hypocrisy, your falseness, your pretensions. And when all pretensions are gone, then the woman you thought was a Juliet is so ordinary - and not even ordinary, but worse than ordinary. And the man you were thinking of as a Romeo - all the Romeo and the romance are finished. He turns out to be just a chicken.
And then the story begins. Then it is constant frustration, and constant effort to find someone else. But religion prohibits adultery, you should remain confined in your family.
When Jesus said, “Love your neighbor.” And if the neighbor happens to be a woman? I sometimes wonder, perhaps he never thought about the implications. Love thine enemy - but if the enemy happens to be a woman?
He was not a great thinker or philosopher, just a poor carpenter’s son. What does he know of logic and its implications?
And because every family is in conflict - the husband and wife are continuously fighting - the children are growing up with this constant fight; this is becoming their imprint. The boy will repeat his father’s structure, and the girl will repeat her mother’s behavior, when they get married. It is a constant repetition, generation after generation, because from where will they learn how to be a husband, how to be a wife? From the mother, from the father - those are the only people who are available in childhood. And that is the most vulnerable time.
The children learn that the parents fight, they use ugly words to each other. Every night there is a pillow fight, every day the wife is nagging. The father feels the wife is just a pain in the neck and nothing else. The father tries to remain as long as possible in the office, and then he goes to the pub. The boy is learning. The girl is also learning: when the husband comes home, the wife is going to beat him.
One of my professors, a professor of economics, was built almost like a wrestler, a very big man, but inside a chicken. I was very friendly with him. In fact, he had to be friendly with me, because that was the time when the medium of expression was changing. From English it was becoming Hindi. So he was accustomed to speaking English, but many times he would get stuck with some word, and I was his only hope - that I would supply him the right word in Hindi.
I used to give him right words, but once in a while I would.