Chapter 15: Now Meditation Is Needed Even More
It is a chaos in their mind, they cannot figure it out. And they are angry against the whole world which kept them in darkness about themselves for their whole life. And still there is no way made available by the society so they can find their real original face.
When you are acquainted with a person there is no need to bother about his anxieties, his future, his past. Your acquaintance is professional. You may meet him in the marketplace: he is a teacher, you are a student; things are quite defined. You are a patient, he is a doctor; things are quite defined. But behind the patient there is a human being, behind the doctor there is a human being - they remain unknown to each other.
But when you love somebody the difficulty arises. When you are really a friend to somebody, a great question haunts you, because now your friendship, your love, cannot be satisfied by knowing that he is a doctor or a professor. You know those are his professional functions, but he is not exhausted by them: Who is he?
The closer you come, the more you become strangers to each other, because all false labels, identity cards, passports, nationalities, religions, start disappearing. You are facing a naked human being, and you are also a naked human being - just the way you were born. Even the name is just a label given by others.
Love reveals the stranger in the other.
This is one of the most significant questions in the human relationship, because you are afraid of the stranger - and the stranger is in your bed! And you don’t know this man, you don’t know this woman; it is risky. If you don’t know this man, this woman, you cannot predict what he is going to do in the night. Perhaps he may steal everything and escape, or may kill you. So people start finding new, phony labels - husband and wife. Again you are going away from each other. You were not capable of remaining strangers and yet lovers.
I would like my people to know that it is a tremendous joy to discover the stranger in your friend, because this is the only reality. Don’t camouflage it, don’t cover it up. Don’t go to a church to get married. Let him remain unpredictable; this is his independence and his birthright. And the same is true for you; this is your independence and your birthright.
In fact, nature does not allow anybody to enter into the privacy of any individual. Nature is immensely compassionate: you cannot trespass.
I can know myself, nobody else can know me. You can know yourself, nobody else can know you. This is a blessing.
Only machines can be known by others. This is man and his privilege, that his privacy is absolutely guaranteed. Only he can enter into his center - experience, feel, understand, see. This is possible only if friends and lovers allow each other to remain strangers.