Chapter 5: One Who Walks Alone
Don’t cling to these experiences either, because they are also on the outside. All experiences belong to the outside; an experience is always an experience of the other, of the outer. Don’t cling to ecstasy or peace or freedom, because as soon as you cling to something you create sansara, the world. Clinging is what sansara is. Don’t cling to anything. Only bear in mind that you are a separate entity, and no matter how near and deep an experience may be it is still far away. The experiencer is always aloof, afar.
You are separate from whatsoever you know, so you cannot make God your experience. God can never become the object of your experience because whatsoever becomes an object of your experience is certain to die.
Nothingness dies, the soundless dies;
even the infinite dies
If you say that you have experienced God then that experience will also die, that God will also die. The only man who will be saved is the man who does not create any duality, who does not know what duality is.
God is not separate from you. God is your very existence, your innermost being. He is your very self, your soul. He is the hidden sound lying deep within your being. He is your own song. And just as a dancer is not separate from his dancing, the experience of God is not separate from you. It is not even proper to call it an experience. That is why the Upanishads say that he who says, “I have known,” has not really known him at all.
How will you know God? To know means there is some distance between the knower and the object that is known. To know a thing some distance is needed, I can see you because you are a little away from me; you can see me because I am at a little distance from you. But how will you see yourself? To see a thing you need some distance.
When you look into a mirror you stand a little away from it; if you go close and put your face against it, it will be difficult for you to see your own face. And if you are able to see a bit of your face it means your eyes are still a tiny distance from the mirror. If your eyes touch the mirror, if they become one with the mirror, then nothing whatsoever will be seen. You may experience a dim figure perhaps, because you and the mirror can never be one; there will always be some distance.
In your deepest depths you are one with God. There is not the slightest distance, not even the most minute space between you and him. That is why the enlightened man says that as long as he was there, God was not there, and that when God was there, he was not there. Deep down within you, you and God are one.
All experiences will die and only you will be saved, so do not cling to experiences. Even yoga and meditation are to be left behind. But remember that you cannot give something up before you have possessed it. Kabir says that nothingness will die, but first you have to become emptiness, first you have to achieve nothingness. Kabir says that aum will die and that even the infinite will die, but you still have to become infinite first. How can something that is not, die?