Chapter 62: Right Now Is the Goal
Just as in the night, you go to sleep. You never ask how to go to sleep. But there are persons who have insomnia. If you say to them, “I just put my head on the pillow, and it’s okay, I am asleep,” they cannot believe you. And their suspicion is meaningful. They cannot believe you; you are deceiving - because they also put their head on the pillow. They go on putting their head the whole night - nothing happens.
They are going to ask how - how to put the head on the pillow? There must be a secret which you are not telling them. You are deceiving; the whole world is deceiving them. Everybody says, “We just go to sleep. There is no ‘how’ to it. There is no technology.” They cannot believe you, and you cannot blame them. You say, “We simply put down our heads, close our eyes, put off the light, and we are asleep.”
They also do the same procedure, they do the same ritual, and they do it more correctly than you have ever done, but nothing happens. The light is off, they have closed eyes, lying on their bed - nothing is happening. Once you lose the capacity to relax, then technique is needed. Then they need technique; then without technique they will not be able to sleep.
So if you have a mind which can relax, then surrender is for you. And don’t create any problems - then simply surrender. At least half of you can do this. You may not be aware, but fifty percent is the possibility, because masculine and feminine minds exist in a proportion. They are always fifty-fifty, almost fifty-fifty, in every realm, because a man cannot exist without a woman opposing him. There is a deep balance in nature.
Do you know? - one hundred and fifteen boys are born to one hundred girls, because boys are weaker than girls - so by the time they are sexually mature fifteen boys will have died. One hundred and fifteen boys are born for every one hundred girls. Girls are stronger: they have more stamina, more resistance. Boys are weak, they don’t have so much resistance, so one hundred and fifteen boys are born for one hundred girls. Then fifteen boys die. The moment they become sexually mature, by the age of fourteen, the number will be the same. For each man a woman exists, for each woman a man exists, because there is an inner tension. They cannot exist without it; that polar opposite is needed.
And similar is the case with the inner mind also. The existence, the nature, needs a balance, so half of you are feminine and can be deeply in surrender very easily. But you can create problems for yourself. You may feel that you can surrender, but you think, “How can I surrender?” You feel that your ego may be hurt. You become afraid of surrendering, because it has been taught to you: “Be independent. Remain independent. Don’t lose yourself. Don’t give your control to someone else. Always be in control.”
This has been taught; these are taught difficulties. So you can feel that you can surrender, but then other problems arise which have been given to you by society, culture and education. And they create problems. If you really feel that surrender is not for you, then forget it. It is not to be worried about. Then put all your energy in effort.