Chapter 6: Awakening
In animals there are not two parts, only the unconscious exists, and with no thinking, it acts. There is no problem, because there is no inner conflict. In a Buddha, also, the same happens from the other end: the whole has become conscious. This is the meaning of enlightenment, satori, samadhi. You have again become one like an animal - one piece. Now, whatsoever Buddha decides, automatically it happens, because there is nobody against it, nobody unaware of it. There is no other in the house. Buddha lives alone in the house, so Buddha need not struggle. He sees a situation, he decides and acts. In fact, decision and action are not two in a Buddha - decision is the act. He simply sees that anger is useless, and anger disappears. There is no effort to impose on it, force it. A Buddha remains loose and natural. He can afford to. You cannot afford to be loose and natural, because the moment you are loose and natural the unconscious comes in. You have to go on controlling yourself, and the more you control, the more artificial you become.
A civilized human being is a plastic flower. He has no vitality, no energy - and when there is no energy, there is no delight. One of the greatest English poets, William Blake, has a beautiful line about it, a very deep insight. He says: Energy is delight. There is no other delight. The very vitality, the very energy of being, is delight, is bliss. Only impotence is misery, weakness is misery. And duality creates impotence.
And whatsoever small energy is left after you are divided in two, that too goes as a wastage in the inner conflict. You are continuously fighting inside, continuously suppressing something, continuously trying to force something else. Anger comes, and you would like to be non-angry; greed comes, and you would like to be greed-less; possession comes, and you would like to be non-possessive; violence comes, and you would like to be non-violent; there is cruelty, and you go on imposing compassion; there is much turmoil, and you would like to be serene and silent; something goes on inside, and you go on imposing something else on it, continuous fight dissipates the remaining energy. And this is going to be so, unless you become one again.
There are two ways to become one: either fall back to the animal, or rise up to the Buddha.
Of course, falling back is easier. Effort will not be needed, you can simply slip back. It is downhill, no effort; and going up is difficult. Hence millions of people choose the downhill way. What is the downhill way as far as consciousness is concerned? Drugs, alcohol, sex, are the downhill way.
In a deep sexual act you again become an animal, you are no more human. The gap is bridged. In a deep sexual orgasm, the duality disappears, the controller is no more there. In a deep sexual act, your whole starts functioning as a whole. Mind is no longer there, ego is no longer there, the controller and the control are no longer there, because the sexual act is non-voluntary. Your will is not needed, your will is not required. You are no more a will, the will is surrendered. Suddenly you are back to the world, the animal world, the natural world; again you have entered into the Garden of Eden, again you are Adam or Eve - no more a civilized human being.