Chapter 26: Cut the Social Crap Completely
If you can keep these two qualities together, you need nothing else. These two will lead you to the ultimate goal of self realization.
It seems to me that human beings feel that just to be themselves is not enough. Why do most people have such a compulsion to reach power and prestige and so on, rather than just being simple human beings?
It is a complicated question. It has two sides, and both have to be understood. First: you have never been accepted by your parents, teachers, neighbors, society, as you are. Everybody was trying to improve upon you, to make you better. Everybody was pointing at the flaws, at the mistakes, at the errors, at the weaknesses, at the frailties, which every human being is prone to. Nobody emphasized your beauty, nobody emphasized your intelligence, nobody emphasized your grandeur.
Just being alive is such a gift, but nobody ever told you to be thankful to existence. On the contrary, everyone was grumpy, complaining. Naturally, if everything surrounding your life from the very beginning goes on pointing out to you that you are not what you should be, goes on giving you great ideals that you have to follow and you have to become, your isness is never praised. What is praised is your future - if you can become someone respectable, powerful, rich, intellectual, in some way famous, not just a nobody.
Constant conditioning against you has created in you the idea, “I am not enough as I am, something is missing. And I have to be somewhere else - not here. This is not the place I am supposed to be, but somewhere higher, more powerful, more dominant, more respected, more well known.”
This is half the story - which is ugly, which should not be the case. This can be simply removed if people are a little bit more intelligent about how to be mothers, how to be fathers, how to be teachers.
You are not to spoil the child. His self-respect, his acceptance of himself, you have to help it to grow. On the contrary, you are becoming a hindrance for growth. This is the ugly part but it is the simple part. It can be removed, because it is so simple and logical to see that you are not responsible for what you are, that this is the way nature has made you. Now unnecessarily weeping over the spilled milk is sheer stupidity.
But the second part is tremendously important. Even if all these conditionings are removed - you are deprogrammed, all these ideas are taken out of your mind - then you will still feel you are not enough; but that will be a totally different experience. The words will be the same, but the experience will be different.