Chapter 2: Accept Yourself As You Are
Trust is nothing but the feel of the pull. You don’t see - one has never seen God; only the pull is felt. But that is enough, that is more than enough. But then you have to be in a certain state where the pull can be felt. It cannot be learned from scriptures; it is not a doctrine. Nobody can explain it: you have to feel the pull.
The old sage laughed. Alexander also realized that it had been a revelation. But the sage said, “Wait; no need to believe in me. You take the thread in your hand and feel the pull, because who knows? This boy may be deceiving. Never believe. Feel the pull.” If Alexander had gone away just listening to the boy, it would have been a belief But he felt the pull: the kite was there on the other end, the pull was here on this end. He could feel the force. He thanked the old sage.
Meditation is a state where you allow yourself to feel the pull of existence. That pull has been called by many names. In the Upanishads they say. Ekam sad viparah bahudha vadanti: that one is one. But sages have called it many names.
The third question:
I seem to have found my question: the closer I seem to get to my beloved, the closer I seem to get to myself - and the further and further away I seem to get from you. Yet according to you, the closer one gets to oneself the closer one gets to you. So something, somewhere, is not what it seems. What is it?
Let me share one anecdote with you..
Henry David Thoreau was dying - on his deathbed. An old friend asked him, “Thoreau, do you believe in the other world, the hereafter?”
Thoreau was just going to die, almost on the verge. He opened his eyes and said, “One world at a time brother, one world at a time.”
If love is happening, forget all about me. One world at a time sister, one world at a time.
Sooner or later, what you are understanding as love now, will disappear. But don’t believe what I am saying - go through it. It always disappears; it is just like the dewdrops in the morning. They look so beautiful, and while they last they are - pearls. But as the sun rises, they evaporate and disappear without even a trace behind. Love is beautiful while it lasts. I am not against love; I am all for it. But it is like dewdrops. What can I do? I am helpless.
So while it lasts, enjoy it. At your stage of mind it must be a need: it will fulfill something. Never drop out of it unless you have ripened, unless it disappears of its own accord; and then, don’t complain; and then, don’t feel frustrated. When love, love that you call love disappears, then a different kind of love arises. Only that love can bring you near me.