Chapter 30: Accept Life in Its Totality
Tantra says, try to understand this whole working of the mind, and then it is good not to fight, then it is good to flow as you are and accept it. We are afraid because if we accept, then how will we change? And Tantra says, acceptance is transcendence. You have tried fighting and you have not changed. Look at your whole life, analyze it, and if you are honest you will find that you have not changed a single bit, not an inch. Move back toward your childhood. Analyze your whole life, and no matter what you may be talking and thinking, the exact, actual life has remained the same. And you have been fighting continuously. Nothing happens out of it.
So now try Tantra. Tantra says, do not fight; no one ever changes with fight. Accept! Then there is no question of what is indulgence and what is repression, and what is brahmacharya and what is this and that. There is no question then! Whatsoever is, you accept it and flow with it. You dissolve your ego resistance, you relax into the existence and go wherever it leads. If the destiny of the existence is that you are meant to be an animal, then, says Tantra, be an animal.
What will happen out of it and how does it happen? Tantra says, total transformation happens - because once you accept, the inner division dissolves, you become one. Then there are not two in you - the saint and the animal, the saint repressing the animal and the animal throwing the saint aside every moment. Then there is no two in you: you become one.
And this oneness gives energy. All your energy is wasted in inner fight and conflict. This acceptance makes you one. Now there is no animal who is to be condemned and no saint who is to be appreciated. You are whatsoever you are. You have accepted it, you have relaxed with it, so your energy becomes one. Then you are a whole and not divided against yourself.
This wholeness is an alchemical transformation. With this wholeness you have energy. Now you are not wasting your life. There is no inner conflict; you are at ease within. This energy which you gain through non-conflict becomes your awareness.
Energy can move in two dimensions. If it moves in fight, you are wasting it every day. If it accumulates and there is no fight, a moment comes just like when you go on heating water to a hundred degrees: then the water becomes something else, it evaporates. Then it is no more liquid, it becomes a gas. It will not become transformed at ninety-nine degrees. It will become transformed only at a hundred degrees.
The same happens inwards. You are wasting your energy every day, and the evaporating point never comes. It cannot come because energy is not accumulated at all. Once the inner fight is not there, energy goes on accumulating and you feel more and more strong.
But not the ego: the ego feels strong only when fighting. When there is no fight, the ego becomes impotent. You feel strong, and that “you” is a totally different thing. You cannot know about it unless you are whole. Ego exists with fragments, division. This “you,” the self or what we call the atman, exists only when there is no division, no inner fight. Atman means the whole; Self means the undivided energy.