Chapter 2: Nobody Is at Home
He said, “I went fishing in my dream and I caught such big fish that even to draw in one big fish was a strenuous job for me, and I caught so many fish. I don’t know where these fish disappear to in the day.”
The other man said, “Stop all this nonsense, you don’t know what I have dreamt. I found in my dream, on one side of me, Sophia Loren, absolutely nude. And I said, ‘My God, have I reached heaven?’ And on the other side was another beautiful woman. It was impossible to judge who was more beautiful.”
The other friend became very angry and he said, “You idiot! You pretend to be my best friend. Why didn’t you call me?” He said, “I did call, but your wife said you had gone fishing.”
Nobody is where you think he is. Nobody is at home. While making love make it a meditative process. Your whole presence has to be there, showering on the woman you love. The woman has to be there, showering all her beauty and grace on her lover. Then you will not be a victim, otherwise you are a victim.
Love is not accepted by your so-called, utterly idiotic religions to be a natural and playful experience. They condemn it. They have made it a condition: unless you leave your woman you will never attain to truth. And the conditioning has been going on for so long that it has almost become a truth, although it is an absolute lie.
You are a victim of traditions and you are certainly dependent. When I read your question further you will see how you are dependent - dependent on a girlfriend who tells you that you are boring, not very juicy and a victim.
Your dependence shows further: “Then I felt very guilty and depressed and utterly unworthy.” If your girlfriend, by saying such simple truths, can make you very guilty and depressed and utterly unworthy, she certainly seems to be your master. “I began to feel inside me a big No.” And this is where your girlfriend has been kind, not to say to you, “You are a little bit of an idiot too.”
You are saying, “I began to feel inside me a big No towards existence.” Now what has existence done? Do you think your girlfriend is existence? “.towards life.” Do you think your girlfriend is life? “.towards love.” And finally, “.towards you.” Why involve me? I have not been giving all these ideas to your girlfriend; I don’t know her. She is not getting these lessons from me about what to tell you.
This shows your utter idiocy. Are you here for me or for your girlfriend? I go on saying things every day and nothing changes in you. And your girlfriend just said that you are a little boring and you don’t doubt her. Perhaps you have come here following your girlfriend. And in what way can you say no to existence, to life, to love and to me? That really is hilarious. I had not said anything and you have included me - on what grounds?