Chapter 26: A Glimpse of Your Own Future
I heard you say that someone who is not yet prepared for enlightenment might die from the experience. I believe it is also possible that the experience remains a short satori and the person comes back to his normal state. This is my own experience. I was in a state of extreme happiness and problemlessness, and had a strong feeling of “I am love,” and then I came back after maybe half an hour. Can you please comment?
Diti, you came quite soon! It is really unique - just in half an hour! You made a great comeback. You had gone through the experience of problemlessness, of extreme happiness and of the feeling of “I am love.” But what happened after half an hour? The problems must have come back, and the misery may have deepened. And what to say about the experience of “I am love”? Now who are you? - I mean after half an hour.
You really did a great job! I am at a loss what to say to you, from where to begin? - before half an hour or after?
Satori is not such a thing. Satori is a miniature experience of samadhi, but once you get into it, you cannot get out of it. That’s the real test and the criterion. Anything that comes and goes is of the mind; it is imagination. Anything that comes and remains, even in spite of you, even if you want it to go it is impossible to get out of it.Satori is forever.
Samadhi is just like the total opening of the lotus, and satori is the beginning of the opening of the petals. Satori is the beginning, samadhi is the climax. But you don’t get out of it. It is one-way traffic; nobody has come out of it.
But mind is capable of imagining anything. It can imagine that there are no problems, but if you look deep down you will feel that you are uneasy about “no problems.” Deep down you will find absolutely a feeling.”What has happened to me?” You will not feel blissful because there are no problems. You will feel very lonely because all your friends are gone, all your relatives.the whole family has disappeared, leaving you alone in darkness. You will make a problem out of this situation. This situation will not be a blissful state, but a state of deep anguish, anxiety, loneliness and a deep longing to be somehow out of it.
What you think is happiness is just a dream of your mind. Your mind is inherently capable of dreaming about everything. It can dream about satori, it can dream about samadhi, in a dream it can become the Buddha - but the dream cannot last long. Even half an hour is too much!
But you seem to have fallen into the trap of the mind. You say, “I have heard you say that someone who is not yet prepared for enlightenment might die from the experience.” You have heard it, but you have not understood it. You have not explored all the implications of it.
What I am saying is: Enlightenment can happen this very moment, even in your unpreparedness, because it does not depend on your preparedness. It is not something that depends on your efforts, readiness. It is a happening beyond you, beyond your reach. It can happen this very moment. It is not happening because this will be dangerous to your very life.