Chapter 26: You Have Your Problem - I’m Going Home
So you cannot find out from where the world has reached to the heights, and you cannot follow because there are no footprints. All there is, is what is written in your scriptures.and you try. The Buddhist tries the way Buddha may have followed. In the first place there is no way to find what way he has followed, because the way is inner and nobody is capable of giving an expression to it. So what is written is a faraway echo in the minds of the disciples.
It is a strange story to remember that the man who remembered the most of what Buddha has said in forty-two years.And Buddha continuously resisted their efforts to write it down because he did not want to leave any scripture behind nor did he want to leave any statue of himself. He wanted to disappear just as if he has not come. One of his names is Tathagata. It has two meanings; both are significant. One is: the man who taught the philosophy of suchness. The other is more literal but has a tremendous significance. Literally the word Tathagata means just came, just gone, leaving no mark behind, just like a breeze comes you feel it and the coolness of it, and it is gone. Neither do you know from where it comes nor you know where it goes.
So for his whole life Buddha did not allow his statements to be compiled. And in the end he said to them, “No statue, no memorial should be made of me because I want to disappear as if I had never been. Because whatsoever is left behind becomes the hindrance for people; it does not help them.”
There is a great insight, very profound - and such egolessness, such simplicity, such humbleness that he wants to disappear silently without any footprints, because nobody can follow anybody else. Nobody can become wise by reading and studying scriptures.
So that greater part of humanity which believes that they know, they are the ones to whom the mystery is not going to happen. But if you are searching, knowing perfectly well that you know nothing - you don’t even know that your ignorance is absolute; it is not that a little bit you know and a little bit you don’t know - in this humbleness, in this acceptance that I don’t know, the mysteries start happening. They happen in spite of you. You cannot manage - they are not manageable, they are not under your control - but once they start happening they make their way through you.
Slowly, slowly the ice of your ego melts and a passage is made. Existence starts singing its songs, sending its music, giving you directions; helping you to find the doors of all that is mysterious and is not available to the mind but only to the man of heart, to the man of humbleness - to the man who is perfectly aware that he knows nothing.
And it is good that you ask, “Beloved master, beloved mystery, who am I?”
You are Satyadharma. This much you should remember; otherwise in the ordinary life you will get lost. Once you forget that you are Satyadharma then you don’t know where you are going and what you are doing.
I have told you two small stories.