Chapter 14: Follow Your Being
I left the group(and I’m going home in a few days.
No, you escaped from the situation. You are a coward and cowards always go on trying to find rationalizations.
You were just going to touch some layer within you and you escaped. Your cleverness is not going to help you; in fact it is your enemy. Just the very moment that you were coming closer to some wound, to some strata which would have been very meaningful and significant, you escaped.
Next time when you come, be ready - you will have to do the group again. You have to do it once completely, because it is going to help you so much. You cannot see, that’s the trouble. You are almost blind, you cannot see. What have you gained by dropping out of it? Just by going home, what are you going to do? Even if it was a little painful, you were not going to be killed by these people. Whenever somebody wants to grow, there is some discomfort. One has to get hurt, but others are going through it, so you were not alone.
That is why I am insisting so much on the group - because people have become so cowardly that they cannot grow alone. In the past, people were really brave. They worked alone, and nothing like a group existed. By and by, as people became cowardly and lost all courage, groups had to be started.
It was unworthy of you. This was going to give you many valuable experiences. If you can gather courage I think you should complete it. Or is it difficult to gather courage? You are really very very scared.
I’m not that scared. I just feel(my mind told me not to do the group. I just woke up one morning, and my mind said not to go back to the group.
So don’t listen to the mind! You have been listening to this mind for your whole life and where has it led, what has it given to you?
This is rot - what you call the mind. It is nothing to do with you, just a crowd; accumulated rubbish that you call your mind. What is the need to listen to it?
You just tell the mind that for seven days you are not going to listen to it. And then don’t listen to it, just go to the group every day. Try, mm? It will be a good experience and you will feel more comfortable about yourself.
You will get out of your bondage, the bondage of the mind, and you will feel free. The mind is your slave, not your master. Who is this mind to tell you not to do the group? If you want to do it, do it, and the mind has to help. If you don’t want to do it, don’t, and the mind has to help you.