Chapter 17: Outgoing, Ingoing
Gurdjieff took his first group of disciples to a place very far away in Tiflis, in Soviet Russia. For three months they were cycling in a forest. That was his first group. After three months he took Ouspensky back to the city. Ouspensky says he became almost mad. The traffic was impossible and he could see that the whole city was dead - all the people mad, talking nonsense. For three months he had been absolutely silent and self-remembering, and when you come back to the city after three months, either you are mad or the whole city is mad! He started asking that he be taken away from there, otherwise he would go mad because his head was exploding.
Those methods are to be done in a school, in isolation - not on ordinary streets and in traffic. Otherwise you take the risk, mm? Good.
Osho, for some years I’ve been studying, and been sitting zazen, and it’s been really beautiful for me. But the last couple of years I’ve been feeling that I need to break out in a certain way; that I need to experience or need to work through some things that are more external than just going within, Zen. And through different ways I’ve come across your writings and I’ve met sannyasins in the United States, so I came here to stay for a few months.
That will be very good. It can happen.. A few people have a personality that is very balanced and they cannot go to any extreme. If they go to one extreme they will have to go to the other also, so that a balancing happens.
As I see, you are a very balanced person, a person who walks in the middle of the way. Zazen is good but it is one extreme, and alone it won’t be helpful to you; you will need a few active methods too. So continue zazen, it is not to be stopped, and start dynamic methods too. This camp will bring a balance, and after it I will suggest to you what other groups to do.
If you stop zazen you will move to the other extreme, and that is not going to help you. You are just in the middle and you need to remain just in the middle. Continue zazen so that one hand goes on becoming passive, and another goes on becoming active; both processes together - outgoing, ingoing. Suddenly between the two will be your experience. Just between the two will be the breakthrough.
I think I would like to become a sannyasin to experience everything here fully.
It will be very very helpful. This will be your name: Madhava Deva. Madhava is one of Krishna’s names; it means the sweet one, and deva means divine. In short simply use Deva, and it will remind you of the divine continuously. And much is going to happen.you leave it to me.