Chapter 12: Get Disturbed
And then if you are simply following rules and regulations given by others, what will you do to your own desires, instincts, longings? You will repress them and they will come up in some way or other.
The boy was dating his schoolteacher. They had dinner, went to a dance, and on the way home he parked his car. She didn’t think too much of that, but after quite a bit of conversation and petting she agreed. They had some fun.
Later she said, “You know, I’m worried.”
“What’s wrong?” asked the lad.
“I am wondering how I am going to face my class tomorrow with a clear conscience, knowing that I have sinned twice.”
“You’ve only sinned once!” said the boy.
“I know, but you’re going to do it again, aren’t you?”
Pratap Chandra Joshi, be a little more aware, be a little more conscious. You must be carrying thousands of snakes and scorpions of repressed desire, of crippled instinct within you, and they are all struggling to come to the conscious; they all want to come out. You go on repressing them, but this is not a real way to live. You will live a phony life - a Hindu life, but not a life!
There are many lives available - the Mohammedan life, the Christian life, the Hindu life, the Jaina life. I teach life only, without any adjective, because I have seen it in my own self and I have seen it in thousands of sannyasins, that unless one starts living life itself one remains phony. Your shyness, your polishedness, your gentlemanliness, is nothing but a cover-up.
A very shy, moralistic, young British gentleman is confiding the difficulties he is having with his romantic life to a fellow public-schoolfriend. “Each day when I go horseback riding in Hyde Park I see this gorgeous damsel also going for her morning ride. She is absolutely beautiful and I am head-over-heels in love with her!”
His more experienced friend is not at a loss. “This is what you have to do. Tonight you paint your horse green, then tomorrow morning when you go for a ride and see her, she will be bound to say something about your horse and so introductions will have been made. Then after a month you can invite her for a drink, then after two months you can invite her for dinner. Then after three months you can invite her down for the weekend to your country cottage and show her your collection of silver snuffboxes. And then after a year she is bound to be yours!”
The shy gentleman excitedly rushes off and paints his poor horse green. The next morning on his ride he meets the lady, and sure enough, she can’t help asking, “I say, why have you painted your horse green?”
Completely flummoxed, his face all red, the shy young gentleman manages to stammer, “Well.my dear.it’s.it’s because I want to fuck you!”