Chapter 4: Learn to Breathe This Air
So Buddha does not talk about love, but he prepares the ground where love blooms. You will not find any talk about love in Buddha’s teachings - he has not even used the word love. But he is a scientist of the soul, he simply gives you medicines. Health is going to happen within you. There is no need to talk about love, there is no need to talk about godliness, there is no need to talk about the ultimate results; all that is needed is to persuade you, to seduce you into taking the medicine.
You are like small children who will not take the medicine - and medicines are bitter - instead they will run and escape from the mother, they will hide. And they will say, “We are not going to take this medicine, it is too bitter.” Their whole concern is that the medicine should be a sweet thing; they are not concerned about the outcome, they are only concerned with the momentary taste. And there are many in the world who become attached to teachings which look sweet.
Buddha may not look very sweet - he is not, he is bitter. He himself has said that he is a physician, that his approach is not that of a preacher but that of a physician; he treats ill people. And this whole world is a hospital, everybody is ill.
What do you want? You want Buddha to talk about love? How is that going to help you? And how are you going to understand it? He will talk about love, his love, and you will understand about love, your love. And they are poles apart, diametrically opposite. His love is a state. It is not a relationship. His love does not depend upon anybody else, his love is simply his overpouring. He is so full that he has to go on overflowing, he has to go on sharing. He is super-saturated, superabundant. There is no way he can avoid loving - he is love.
When you are in love you are not love, you are only “in love.” When you are in love it is a kind of relationship, a need; you are a beggar. When you are in love you are asking for love. “Give me love” - that’s what you call love. Even if you have to give a little bit, you give it only as part of the bargain. But you want to snatch more than you have been given. That’s the conflict between all the lovers, husbands and wives - constantly fighting and quarreling. What is the base of it? Each is thinking, “I am giving more and receiving less - the other is cheating.” Both want to cheat each other. And I can understand what the problem is. When you are asking for love, one thing is certain; you don’t have any love in your being, otherwise, why should you ask? If you have, you need not ask; you will be fulfilled by it, it will be welling up in you, it will be flowing. In fact, you will ask people to receive, to open their hearts. And you will feel grateful to people who receive your love. You will not be a beggar. You will be an emperor.
Buddha is an emperor. He gives, and he is thankful to all those who receive. When you fall in love, you are just a beggar: two beggars begging each other. The outcome is misery, the outcome is ugly, the outcome is hell. Buddha’s love is not a relationship, it is relating. He simply relates, but there is no bondage in it, there is no obsession with any person in particular. Buddha talking about love will be saying one thing, you will understand something else.