Chapter 23: Love: Not a Relationship but a State of Being
The loving state is unaddressed. And I am not preventing you from being in the state of love, but you can be in the state of love only if you drop the old mind pattern of relationships. Love is not a relationship.
Two persons can be very loving together. The more loving they are, the less is the possibility of any relationship. The more loving they are, the more freedom exists between them. The more loving they are, the less is the possibility of any demand, any domination, any expectation. And naturally, there is no question of any frustration.
You say, “And I can’t say I blame You.” You understand it rightly. I have allowed people to have their real or imaginary love relationship with me - for the simple reason that unless they are with me, there is no possibility of transforming their relationship into a state of being - knowing perfectly well that their relationship is not reliable. No relationship is reliable, and particularly with a man with whom the relationship is one-sided. It is like a bridge which is supported only by one bank of the river, and the other bank does not support it. It is hanging in the air; it is going to fall.
And I have burned my fingers thousands of times, because the people who thought they loved me.I have seen them change to hating me, for some trivial reason.
Love is beyond reason.
Relationship is part of the business world. Just a slight change in the situation, and it evaporates. It has no solidity.
I have showered my love without any conditions, and yet there have been many people who have taken advantage of it, in many ways. And because of their loving imagination, they were expecting something from me. Man is so blind, he cannot see it. When I don’t expect anything from you, at least remember that you cannot expect anything from me either.
And when their expectations are not fulfilled - and they are not going to be fulfilled - then immediately love turns into hate. And it has left wounds in my heart, because I have simply given love, never expected anything from them, and they have turned into enemies because of their expectations - in which I have no part. I have never promised them anything. Expectations are there, frustrations are there - but first they were projecting expectations; now they are projecting frustrations. Neither could they see last time, nor are they able to see this time, that they are surrounded with their own unconscious ideas. And they are suffering.