Chapter 5: That State Is Awakening
The words pure Self have to be understood - there is a possibility of misunderstanding because of the word Self. But the condition of purity makes it clear that by the Self ego is not meant at all. You can call it the egoless self, because the ego is the impurity. All that is arbitrary and artificial is impure; all that is natural and intrinsic is pure. You bring your original face with you and then you start wearing masks; those masks are your impurity. And ego has many masks because you have to relate with many people; in different situations you need different faces. You have to change your face constantly.
It is said of George Gurdjieff that he was such a great actor that he would be talking to two persons, one sitting on the left and the other sitting on the right, and he would show different faces to both of them. When he turned to the left he would show one face, when he turned to the right he would show another face. And both the persons would argue later on about the man; they would both describe him in different ways. One would say, “How loving he was! How compassionate! How blissful!” And the other would say, “What are you saying? Have you gone mad? He was so arrogant, so egoistic, so cruel, so violent, almost murderous!”
Gurdjieff used to enjoy that very much; he would leave such different impressions. He was capable of changing his mask because he knew his original face. You don’t know your original face. You change your masks, but that too is mechanical, almost autonomous - you don’t change it, it changes by itself. When you are talking to your wife you have one face, when you are talking to your beloved you have another face.
Just watch a little and you will be able to see the truth of it. When you are talking to your boss you can’t have the same face as when you are talking to your servant. When the boss enters your room you immediately stand up, wagging your tail - which does not exist but still you way! And when the servant enters the room you don’t take any note of him at all. If you are reading your newspaper you go on reading, if you are smoking you go on smoking. He is a nonentity; there is no need to take any note of him. He comes and goes as if he has not come and not gone; nothing has happened, he is not an event. If even a rat comes in the room you will take note of it - you many stand on your chair - but the servant does not exist.
Watch next time when your servant enters the room or your boss enters the room, your wife, your child, your friend, your enemy, and look how different you are.
The “pure Self” means the original face, unadulterated, unpolluted, the pure mirror with no reflection, with nothing to reflect. It has four quarters - four dimensions you can call them, four stages you can call them, four quarters you can call them.
The first is the waking state..
The translation is not right. The translation should be: The first is the so-called waking state. The word so-called is missing - because it is not really a waking state, it is only so-called. Do you think you are awake? Each morning you open your eyes, that is one thing, but to be awake is totally different. Just close your eyes any time in the day and you will find an undercurrent of dreams, fantasies going on.