Chapter 12: Stand in Your Son’s Shoes
If you want to meditate, contemplate, good. But choose something positive. Meditate on a roseflower, it is positive. Meditate on the rising sun, it is positive. Meditate on the moon. Meditate on a child playing, laughing, jumping, dancing. Meditate on something which is flowering, opening unfolding, which is alive. Meditating on the negative is meditating on the desert - and you become that on which you meditate. You will become that on which you meditate so meditate on love, meditate on life, meditate on God.
And if something looks very beautiful to you but it is a negative statement, turn it into a positive statement. Each statement can be turned into a positive statement. And great is the change. When you want to say “no” try to say it in such a way that it has the form of “yes.” Don’t say “no.” You can always find a way to say something in such a way that even if it is a “no” it comes in the form of “yes.” And it will be helpful to you.
You must have come across people who are so addicted to the “no” that even sometimes when they want to say “yes” they find a negative way of expressing it.
The third question:
Will you marry me?
Again? The day you became a sannyasin you got married to me. This question is from Dharma Chetna. To ask again means you have forgotten!
When he was very old somebody asked Immanuel Kant, the German philosopher, “Why didn’t you ever get married? Did you never propose to anybody?” Kant brooded over it and said, “To think of it, yes, once I did propose to a girl.”
The inquirer became very interested. He said, “Then what happened?” Kant said, “Something went wrong. I proposed a second time. I proposed one day and the next day I proposed again. And the girl got very mad.”
Kant’s memory was not very good - the girl had accepted him the previous night. Can you marry a person who proposes a second time? This man is not reliable. After marriage he will come one day and he will say, “Who are you and what are you doing here?”
Sannyas is a marriage - but it is deeper than the marriage that you know about. In an ordinary marriage two bodies meet At the most, if one is very fortunate, two minds meet - that is rare. The marriage that sannyas is, is not of the body not of the mind, but of the souls. Two beings meet. To be with the master is to be in deep love with the master, to be surrendered, to be open, to go with him wherever he is going with gratitude, with trust.
You are married, Chetna. Keep alert. Don’t go on forgetting.
The fourth question: