Chapter 72: Start Living in Insecurity
So lovers are always frustrated with each other because they thought the other was just divine, and when they settle, when everything becomes just mundane, just ordinary, they think the other was deceiving. No, he was not deceiving, he was just presenting himself in his best colors. That is all. He was not deceiving anybody, he was not consciously doing anything. He was just presenting himself in his best colors. And the same was done by the other. But you cannot go on presenting yourself like that for long because it becomes arduous, difficult, heavy. So you come down.
When two lovers settle, when they start to take each other for granted, then they appear very mean, very mediocre, very ordinary - just the opposite to what they appeared to be before. Then they were angels; now they appear to be just disciples of the devil. You fall down, you come to your ordinary level.
Ordinary love is not a challenge, but it is rare to fall in love with someone who is enlightened. Only very fortunate ones fall in such a love. It is rare. It happens only when you have been searching for an enlightened person for lives together. Only if this has happened do you fall in love with an enlightened person. Fall in love with an enlightened person is in itself a great achievement - but then there is a problem. The problem is that the enlightened person is a challenge. He cannot come down to your level, that is not possible, that is impossible. You have to go to his peak; you have to travel, you have to be transformed.
So love becomes a sadhana if you fall in love with a buddha. It becomes a sadhana, the greatest sadhana that is possible. Because of this, whenever there is a Buddha or a Jesus, or a Lao Tzu, many around them are able to reach to peaks in one life that they could not have reached in many lives. But the secret is if they can fall in love. It is not unimaginable, it is imaginable. You may have been there in the time of Buddha, you must have been somewhere around. Buddha might have passed through your village or town and you may not have even heard him, you may not have seen him. Because even to hear a buddha or to see a buddha or to come near to him, a certain love is needed, a certain search is needed on your part.
When someone falls in love with an enlightened person it is meaningful, very meaningful. But arduous will be the path. It is easy to fall in love with an ordinary person, there is no challenge, but with an enlightened person the challenge will be much, and the path will be difficult, because you will have to travel all above. And those things will be disturbing. His love will be cold, his love will look as if it is for everyone, his love will not have the hatred part.
This has been my experience. Many people fall in love with me, and then they start to play the game - the ordinary game. Knowingly or unknowingly, they start to play it. In a way it is natural. They start expecting things from me, ordinary expectations, and their mind works in the duality. For example, if you love me you will feel happy if you can make me happy. This is how love feels, it wants to make the other happy. If you can make me happy, you will feel happy - but you cannot make me happy, I am already.