Chapter 30: Live This Moment Totally
Howsoever accurate the plan, it cannot be exactly that way because you are not alone here, mm? You can go out on the street and a drunken driver hits you - and it was never in your plans. You go to Goa, and some germs enter you and give you hepatitis. It was not in your plan, but the germs were planning their life, and the drunken driver was going on his way.
Live this moment totally, and the next will come out of it. Live an unplanned life, because only then it is life.
And I don’t see that you are not working hard, you are doing as much as you can. That too is greed - that one should do more. That greed can never be fulfilled, because whatever you do, you can always imagine that more can be done. Greed is never satisfied.
So drop it, and whatsoever you can do you are doing. Enjoy it rather than expecting more. Bring a deeper quality to it, rather than a quantitative increase. And forget about the future!
How is your relationship going?
Well, I feel good, and it’s the nicest thing that has happened to me for a very long time. But what’s happening is that he wants me to just be a friend - and I want more than that. He says that he cares about me, but he is not turned on by me.
Don’t insist for more, just friendship is perfectly good. There are two possibilities for every human being. One is that you fall in love, and by and by friendship grows out of that. Lovers always become friends in the end - and if they cannot, then somewhere they have missed and something has gone wrong - because by and by the passion settles.
Passion is a very, very excited state of mind which you cannot live in for very long. By the time the honeymoon is over, so is the passion. Then friendship arises. So this is one possibility - that two people fall in love. There is tremendous passion; they are almost in a cyclone, lost. They move at the peaks, they have completely forgotten the valleys for a few days. But nobody can live at the peak; at the most you can be there for a holiday. One settles in the valley.
So by and by a love relationship settles and becomes calm and tranquil and harmonious - then friendship arises. Husband and wife become like brother and sister. But there are problems, because once the fever has gone, the woman starts thinking that the man doesn’t love her enough now, and the man thinks the same of the woman.