Chapter 2: In the Arms of the Moon
The old man suggested, “Hide in man himself. There he will never find you. And even if he finds you, a man who is so wise as to find you within himself will not create any trouble for you. Hillarys can create trouble, but buddhas cannot because by the time they find you inside themselves they will be almost like you. They will not have any complaints, they will not have any question. They will be as silent as you are, they will be as deep as you are. By the time they reach you inside themselves, they will have been transformed. The very journey will become a mutation.”
God is hiding within you, but you cannot see God there directly because you don’t know how to go there.
One method, one way is of meditation: start dropping your thoughts. One day when there is no thinking, no ripple, and you are a no-mind you will reach there, the conversion will happen. Another way is of prayer.
The sannyasin who has asked is Rama Bharti. Her path is going to be that of prayer and love. That’s why she feels so much awe when she comes close to me. I have seen her almost tremble, as if some unknown breeze is passing through her. I have seen her throbbing with an unknown rhythm. Love is her path. She has to use this quality of awe - it is rare. Very few people have it. It is disappearing from the world.
People have become much too intellectual, much too hung-up in their heads. They have forgotten the language of the heart. Awe is the script, the very script of that language. Feel it, allow it to possess you, be possessed by it. It will lead you to the innermost temple of your own being. There will be a conversion, and in that moment your consciousness will have a great shift. Suddenly, it will not be looking at me, it will start looking at itself. That is the only way to know God.
The second question:
When you are a Zen master telling us to choose our path and stick to it, I felt sure that my path was of the head, that I would never be able to surrender to anyone. Now, after one lecture on the Baul mystics, I feel like a lovesick schoolgirl. How to choose a path when you have none? How to be a light unto myself when your light dazzles me every morning?
I can understand your difficulty but it is being created knowingly. I will throw you from one path to another many times because that is the only way for you to find out which is your path. Sometimes I will push you, pull you towards meditation; sometimes I will force you towards love, prayer. You will need the taste of both. Only then can you be decisive about it, otherwise not. Just by listening to me you cannot decide because while you are listening to me you are too much impressed by me.