Chapter 20: The Pagan: Chrysalis of Consciousness
You have not to do anything other than that. Just seeing, just watching its whole process: how the problem arises, how it takes possession of you, how you become completely clouded by it, blinded by it; and how you start acting madly, for which you repent later on, about which you realize later on that it was sheer insanity, that “I did it in spite of myself. I never wanted to do it, still I did it. And even when I was doing it I knew that I didn’t want to do it.” But it was as if you were possessed..
This very idea of being possessed by ghosts and spirits is nothing but a very ancient symbolical way of saying what I am saying to you. A man possessed by a ghost has nothing to do with any ghost; it is his own unconscious, his own jealousy, his own anger, hatred, his own unconscious mind. And his conscious mind is so small that the unconscious takes it over.
It appears almost as if somebody from outside has taken possession of you, because you are identified with your conscious mind - a small island - and an ocean from all around splashes on you, covers you with its foam. Naturally you think, Something from the outside has taken possession of me, and I am doing things which I don’t want to do.
Almost ninety-five percent of murderers have confessed in all the courts of the world.. No judge believes them because no judge is yet a psychoanalyst. This is such a mad world - that a murderer is being judged by a man who has studied law. Now what has law to do with murder? Is there any connection between law and murder? Do you think by learning law you become a murderer, or by learning law you become able to understand how murder happens, why a man kills somebody?
Law has nothing to do with it. That’s why I say this is a very mad world. A psychoanalyst should be judging because he can understand why a man murders. And when the man says, “I was not in my senses when I did it. I feel sorry for it, I cannot believe even now that I have done it. I have done it, but I cannot believe how it became possible..
But no judge is going to understand him. No judge has the capability of understanding. He would have done the same himself - knowing all the laws makes no difference. In fact legal people commit more illegal acts in the world than anybody else because they know exactly how to bypass laws, how to find out loopholes. And no law is perfect, there are loopholes. You need a little intelligence to find the loophole, and then you can do the thing without being caught.
I loved, in my high school days, one of my Mohammedan teachers, Maulana Rahimuddin. He was a scholar and certainly a man you could call wise. He used to be the superintendent of all the examinations. He was the oldest, seniormost teacher in the school. At every examination he would come into the examination hall and the first thing he would say was - and he was a very loving old man - “My boys, I have to inform you of a few things.
“One thing: copying from anybody is not a crime, it is not a sin - but getting caught is. If you have brought notes with you, hiding in your clothes, or if you have got books hidden in your pants and in your coats, I have no objection. Just be careful, because I am here to do my duty; I will try my best to catch you. You do your best not to be caught.