Chapter 23: Trees Grow without Being Taught
There are famous families - they are called gharanas. Gharana means family. It is nothing to do with the ordinary family; it is the family of the master/disciple. So there are famous gharanas which have a certain way of their own. Presenting the same instrument, the same dance, different gharanas will produce it in different ways, with subtle nuances. So, if someone really wants to get into the world of music, he has to become part of some gharana - and that is not good company. According to a rich man it is certainly not good company.
But the son was not interested in the company. Not following his father, he went to the music university. His father disowned him, he was so angry. And because his father disowned him and because he had no other way - because the university was in a very remote mountainous area where you cannot find any job or anything - he came back and had to become exactly what his father was predicting, just a school teacher.
His father called me and told me, “Look, it is just as I have said. My other sons - somebody is an engineer, somebody is a professor, but this idiot did not listen to me. I have disowned him; he will not inherit a single cent from me. And now he will remain in just the poorest profession - a school master.”
But my friend himself was immensely happy.not worried that he had been abandoned by his family, that he was going to live a poor man’s life, that he would not be receiving any inheritance. These things did not bother him; he was happy, “It is good they have done all this - now I can become part of some gharana. I was worried about them, that they would feel humiliated. But now they have abandoned me, and I am no longer part of them, I can become part of some gharana.”
Teaching in a school, he became part of a gharana, and is now one of the best musicians in India. It is not that he is one of the best musicians; what is important is that he became what he felt was his potential. And whenever you follow your potential, you always become the best. Whenever you go astray from the potential, you remain mediocre.
The whole society consists of mediocre people for the simple reason that nobody is what he was destined to be - he is something else. And whatever he will do, he cannot be the best, and he cannot feel a fulfillment; he cannot rejoice.
So the work of the parents is very delicate, and it is precious, because the whole life of the child depends on it. Don’t give any positive program - help him in every possible way that he wants.
For example, I used to climb trees:
Now, there are a few trees which are safe to climb; their branches are strong, their trunk is strong. You can go even to the very top, and still there is no need to be afraid that a branch will break. But there are a few trees which are very soft. Because I used to climb on the trees to get mangoes, jamuns - another beautiful fruit - my family was very much worried, and they would always send somebody to prevent me.
I told my father, “Rather than preventing me, please explain to me which trees are dangerous - so that I can avoid them - and which trees are not dangerous, so that I can climb them.